Sweet Revenge You've Lied Again
by Amaterasu Kinesi
Summary: Isabella Swan has been living in a world of lies built by her mother, searching for solace she goes to Rome in search of something, anything. She calls herself the Broken, the Bruised, the Poor Ones, in need of some truth,"Come save me," is all she asks.
1. I am the Broken

**WARNING!:**_This __story __has __been __rated __**M **__for __mature __themes __that __will __be __touched __upon __in __current __and __future __chapters, __such __as __language, __intimacy, __emotional __turmoil, __death, __and __anything __else __that __some __will __find __offensive. __Therefore, __if __anyone __here __is __easily __offended, __please, __turn __back __and __do __not __read __this __story. __Thank __you, __you __have __been __given __fair __warning._

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_**Disclaimer**:_

_For all intents and purposes;_

_No copyright infringement intended. The Twilight Saga and all characters involved within this story are the property of **Stephenie****Meyer**. However, the plot is entirely my own._

_**This applies to the rest of the story.**_

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**Sweet Revenge You've Lied Again**

**_I __am __the __Broken, __I __am __the __Bruised, __I __am __the __Poor __Ones_**

Words… just aren't enough. Words have never been enough for me, always abandoning me at the worse of times, though never lacking in "abundance". Still, if it weren't for their shortcomings and incapability of expressing everything, I would have never turned to the pleasures of my artistic world.

There, a square or a rectangle of canvas serves as a center stage and a spiral of twenty-four colors serves as the main attraction, and I am the author of their connotations. Within the white pages of a sketchbook, I've always found a way to say what words are never enough to express or explore, and find balance within their blank possibilities, recreating something entirely my own –recreating myself, each and every time with a stroke of color, or a scratch of ink, and, or lead.

Bleeding my soul into the pages, through the led of my pencils, or through the hair of my brushes, and adding on words in color form, I know who I am. These words that have no one written form or sound but can be understood and heard just as well, if not better, are always appearing in unusual, creative ways. Always fleeting through my mind.

It could be in the way the light filters, dancing through the leaves of a tree, or the shadows that stretch with every step I take, cloning my movements and always ahead, but never fleeing –just _chasing_. Or it could be the immense square of blue sky and adorning clouds, with their games of changing noses as seen through the windows from the corner of my eye in class –always so very distracting.

Or perhaps, the view spied between the empty spaces of my shielding fingers or hair… a different angle seen by simply tilting my head and craning my neck at a certain degree… a smudge on the wall. Always in snapshots, between every slow blink… and so many other similar and seemingly insignificant moments that only my eyes always seem to catch with my snapshot view of the world.

_A view within a room without a window… _

The workings of my mind have always been something along those lines, in my mind's eye. Along side it, there is a soul that craves to immortalize itself on canvas and palpitates with its own heartbeat, until it hums and flutters when its desire has been sated. Only returning moments later, having spied yet, another colorful manner for immortalization within the vast expanse of another canvas and smudges of colored souls.

There was a time, in my naivety and canvas captivated world, when I couldn't even fathom the possibility of my wanting to give up my ways of viewing this world or the feelings and emotions that accompanied my character. Now, after everything, I think much differently and things have changed to something more complex.

No longer do my worries stretch to just the troubles of choosing between pearl pink or baby pink to properly showcase my portrayal of a twilight sky about to fade. No, they have become much more than that… like a sea of black stretching as far as the eye can see and beyond.

_If only I could stop myself from feel as strongly as I always do. _

_If only…_

Right now… my canvas has been painted a nightmare black and at its heart, in different stages of bloom, a fire-flower struggles to unfurl from within a dot of amber its hues of red, ox red, blood red, carmine, cardinal, crimson, electric crimson folly, scarlet, fire brick, lust, and hints of electric blue, ceruleans, and navy, like an eccentric growing flame. The metaphorical, metaphysical, and physical canvases were all illustrating this singular depiction.

Beautiful and bright, enough to earn me an "A plus" in class, for more than just the effort and creativity behind the piece, which also credits to its simple title: "_Rage_".

My canvas is _Rage_. Only, my rage is not beautiful, like I depicted it within the confinements of my canvas, which still continues to bleed and smear in the violent colors of my rage, unable to sustain, and keep it all trapped within its frame, but just as colorful and scathingly bright –still, aflame.

Now you see… why words are simply _never_enough. A blank canvas can say more than words ever could, because I paint that which I cannot voice… that which I cannot speak for fear I might say more than I should when words are finally more than enough.

All I need is a blank canvas, a brush to sway under the rhyme of my feelings, and twenty-four colors to say, and depict everything I have dissected from the turmoil within. Only then, would I be able to show who I really am, and what I really feel. However, I cannot answer the "why", at least, not yet.

_Enough__Isabella!_I chided myself mentally, trying to push everything aside for the moment, and enjoy this new chapter in my life for the next two weeks...

I sighed contentedly as I exited the _Leonardo __da __Vince __Fiumicino __Airport __of __Rome _and walked onto Rome's cobbled streets, a welcomed instability under my inept feet.

"Finally!" Breathing in that fresh air. Feeling exuberant, I laughed at my enthusiasm. I had finally arrived at my destination, Rome, Italy, after seven and a half murderous long hours on a plane. Not that the flight had been bad or anything. It just had been very tiring and frustrating to sit for so many hours with little room for stretching my legs or stand comfortably.

Still, nothing could truly dampen the triumph and excitement my actually being here brought upon me.

_Fly __to __Rome, __Italy __at __least __once __in __your __life,_ check! And that brings the bucket list down by one! And there were many others listed that I could knock off that same list by simply being here and visiting a few places. I almost couldn't wait to start marking them off!

It was approximately 7:00 a.m. in Rome, yes, in the morning, and surprisingly enough, my brain was quite functional for such an early morn, or rather, so late at night. Given that my internal clock back home said that it was around 11:00 p.m. and almost past my bedtime. But those were all minor details that I could pin on my current excitement.

Now, all I need to do is to head out to the _Forum__Termini_, the _Leonardo __Express_ train, get on the train, and then I would be on my way to the Coliseum Prefecture. Where my hotel, the_Hotel__Anfiteatro__Flavio_**,** is located and get some much needed down time, just with no sleep, since I need to get rid of the jetlag and get on the Italian schedule, and the sooner the better.

The _Hotel __Anfiteatro __Flavio,_ where I will be staying during my getaway, is located in _Via__dei __Serpenti_. Meaning, I could find just about anything I might need near its surroundings: such as shopping facilities, great selection and variety of restaurants, cinemas, theatres, and, most importantly, museums.

And if I later found it within my heart, there would be shopping opportunities aplenty. Including and not limited to, the top boutiques in _Via __Nazionale_, _Via __del __Corso_, _Piazza __di __Spagna_ and _Via __del __Tritone_. Just like Alice had so graciously pointed out when she had helped me find a hotel in which to lodge during my stay in Rome. Even I had to admit a little time spent doing some tedious shopping would be worth it, even if I had to go out of my way to do so.

Though I kept it from Ali dearest, the true highlight and selling point of having chosen this specific hotel was that _The __Spanish __Steps_, _Trevi __Fountain_, and the _Piazza __Navona_ were all no more than a fifteen minutes walk from the hotel. Something I was very much looking forward to confirming and so very thrilled to have the chance to finally see.

I wanted to visit all of those places along with the _Vatican_**, **_the __Coliseum_**, **_the __Sistine __Chapel_, and what I wouldn't give to see the famous works of _Michelangelo_, who still remains one of my top muses while painting. And if I was not wrongly informed, The _Opera_, the _Saint __Mary __Major __Church_, and the _Coliseum_ were all within short walking distance from the hotel as well, meaning that I would have to visit those too.

Again, _I __couldn__'__t __wait!_

Now, back on track and getting to where the train is. According to my itinerary, the train leaves every thirty minutes, yet another thing that worked out to my advantage. Since it wouldn't be a problem if I didn't make it in time or took too long to make it to the station because I would just be able to catch the next train when it came in another half hour.

I was equipped with everything I would need while being here, a translator, maps, and countless itinerary for just as countless museums as well as the train's running hours. All courtesy of Alice, my best friend extraordinaire, and her uncanny knack for planning within state and out of state, as I'd just found out.

_That__'__s __it, __I __better __buy __her __something __that __can __only __be __found __here __as __a__ "__thank __you__" __souvenir __before __returning __home_, _or __she__'__ll __have __my __head,_ I mentally added to my still growing to-do list.

I couldn't help _but_ feel excited. I was in Rome of all places for the first time in my life. Actually, I was _anywhere_ for the first time in my life! I would never count Phoenix, nor Forks, much less Forks, as anywhere, I'm sure you don't even need to ask why. But now, now I had two and a half weeks to leave behind and forget the real world for a while, and live a little, indulge myself in meaningless trinkets. Which had been the purpose of this trip in the first place. Well, that and hands-on research for the impending deadline of a looming school project, which would cost me more than half of my final grade average.

But really, I shouldn't have to be thinking about homework during the few minutes I have been in Rome! Honestly, more than anything, this trip was meant to serve as an escape rout from the chaos my life back home had suddenly turned into and the events that had followed, leaving me for a broken shell and a crying mess.

_Home._At the thought alone, my heart felt that now familiar pain as I long for home. Unsuccessfully, I try shuddering those thoughts away. _I__'__m __tired __and __I__'__m __missing __what__'__s __behind, __that__'__s __all_. I've never been very good at deceiving myself, much less now.

_I__'__ll __hold __all __her __words __close__… '__Till __she __feels __this __pain __too__…_

But I'm sure she'll live on so very unaware of how she left me, crying and hurt here. _Did __she __see __that __I __was __hurt? __Will __she __tell __me __all __this __was __her__self-protection?_ I only hope that this _hate_will heal me somehow, until I can unleash this vengeance that I seek, but this hate is never ending. And it's killing me inside.

_I __want __to __be __free__… __but __can __I __forgive __her __and __end __this __pattern? __Can __I __free __her __from __her __chains __and __in __turn __free __myself? _I knew the answer to all of these questions, because I had covered my eyes so that my heart could finally _see_. In doing so, _I __find __I __can__'__t __get __free, __until __I __release __this __vengeance __that __I __seek._

Once again, all that I knew changed and I find myself saying my goodbyes to those I love most. Traversing the path of cowardice. Running away from everything I should be confronting head on. Too afraid to finally allow myself to acknowledge all the lies I had so precariously been ignoring for years. Empty lies that I had been hiding from had finally caught up with me after accumulating like dust on the surface of a life filled with wishful thinking and misery.

_How can I be silent?_

Even while the tears are falling, I find that I fear the promises that are awaiting my return more than this hindering, gilded cage that I barely discovered after trying to fly away and finding myself shackled. In my shame, I want to run and hide myself. In some twisted fashion, this is the only way I know I can stop all this pretending. The only way I can stand up for myself and like a million voices breaking the silence, I want to be heard.

_I __want __to __be __free __and _need _to __make __her __regret__…_

Once I had reached the station and situated myself comfortably on the train's velvety, burgundy chairs, I tried to relax for a change. As I sat on the train, staring out my window, and seeing nothing, I thought about everything I had been trying to avoid think of for longer than a moments thought.

How my beloved sunny Phoenix had become the one place to avoid by all means. And how, now, I hated the way the sun would shine so brightly and delicately, casting its warmth upon its continuously growing population, full of promises. If at all possible, I wanted to dim the sun and its brightness in my selfishness.

Hated the well-travelled streets and their sea of faces, roaming, soaking up on epidemic cheerfulness with an innocence that I have forever lost. That had been stripped form me by someone I would have never suspected had it in her to harm me in such a cruel and barbaric manner. I hated her too, and in a twisted, unavoidable way, still loved her.

_Love, __hate__… _I don't think I knew the difference between the two anymore, or _if_there was a distinct difference at all.

More than anything, I wanted to open the floodgates of heaven and let everyone know exactly how I felt. Bound and tangled in shades of grey and black, waiting impatiently for the floodgates to give way, just so that I could rain down and leave it all the pain and the hurt behind.

Forget it all… Only then, if I could do that, would my pain wash over me and rain on them like a downpour of hail, leaving me with a scarred reminder, but finally free from my manacles. Then, I would willingly welcome the numbness that would surely follow.

_If only…_

Broken heart, one more time.

_Pick __yourself __up. __Don__'__t __even __cry. _Like a constant war, I kept trying to convince myself I was capable of overcoming, over and over again. Truth is, I don't think I have it in me to see myself through this torture inflicted upon me.

I felt so heartbroken. And I found myself wishing that it were the kind of heartbreak that came from a messed up, illicit relationship. Wishing that I was the other woman trying to be "the one", only to find that my affair would lead me nowhere because there was no way he was going to ruin his reputation and leave _her_for me. And finally, after having had such a heartrending revelation, bringing an end to the heart-shriveling, illicit relationship with no chance of future amiability, irreparable. Something like that would have been bearable, welcomed even.

No, that wasn't my case. I would have welcomed that kind of heartbreak, to this kind of heartache. Never in my life have I been more jealous of women with questionable morals and no capacity to think for themselves. In fact, in my twenty years of age I have never been with a man before, much less in love.

Actually, that might be a lie, if I counted Jasper and our _discoveries _of each other three years ago, almost to the date. Which I almost never wanted to do, for obvious reasons and since there was too much history and heartache there to accompany his bittersweet memory.

Jake and I had met him during the last week of our thirteenth summer in Phoenix and the beginning of my last year of middle school. That day had been so magnificently sunny that we had taken a day to soak up some sunrays and found ourselves at the Fort Phoenix Beach enjoying ourselves.

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"_Jake, __do __you __hear __that?__" _I asked, having caught the distinct, fleeting sound of a melodious whistling.

"_What are you talking about Bells? This beach is so crowded I can't pick out anything but–"_

"_Can__'__t __you __hear __that __whistling? __I __wonder __what __tune __it __is__…__?__"_

This unquenchable urge to go investigate its source was beginning to grow so intensely it was almost nagging. I stood.

"_Bells, what ar–"_

"_Lets __investigate!__" _With a smile I reached out for his hand.

"_Only__ '__cause __we__'__d __agreed __it__'__s __your __day __to __call __the __shots, __Bells,__" _Jake groaned.

"_Don__'__t __kid __yourself, __Sunshine,__" _I smirked and guided him by following the quiet source of the bewitching tune.

"_I think I hear it now…"_

"_Told __you,__"_ I said, almost smugly, _"__I __know __I__'__m __not __crazy,__or __tone __deaf.__"_

The sight of him had caught my attention immediately, lounged on the sand in a secluded are and whistling with eyes closed, alone by the looks of it.

"_That__'__s __amazing, __how __you __whistle,__"_ I blurted out before Jacob, or I for that matter, could stop myself. His eyes fluttered open startled. _"__What __tune __is __that?__"_

_"Uh…"_ he blinked.

"_Bells,__" _Jacob muttered and grabbed my hand. _"__Sorry.__We__'__re __leaving __now,__"_ he apologized with an easy grin and started to pull me away, while I glared at him.

_"It's… "Happiness", the tune,"_ he replied hesitantly, effectively stopping our retreat.

"_You __think __you __can __teach __me __to __whistle __like __that?__"_ I asked eagerly without missing a beat and pulling Jacob with me, got closer to his now sitting form. _"__I __never __seem __to __be __able __to __keep __a __tune __going __while __whistling__…"_

"_Sure,__"_ he answered, laughing at my exuberance and forwardness. _"I can teach you, since it's not a family secrete or anything and I don't have to kill you after,"_ he added mischievously.

"_Lucky __me.__"_ Immediately, I was captivated by his mischievous smile, easy laughs, golden, unshorn looks, and tasteful southern drawl.

"_Jasper's the name."_

"_Isabella, or Bella. I prefer Bella. And this is–"_

"_Jacob. But you can call me Jake."_

"_Pleasure, Bella, Jake. Have a sit… or sand." _

By the end of that week, Jake had returned back home to Forks. Meanwhile, Jasper and I had exchanged phone numbers. Which gave way to many early morning phone calls, late night texts, and exchanged pictures he'd taken the liberty to title, "_Moments __of __Happiness_".

The first being of Jake and I seated on the sand, facing the sea, watching the setting sun, laughing with our backs to the camera, and an arm round each other, a true moment of happy bliss. The second came two months after, a candied shot of me with my head thrown back in laughter, cheeks flushed, and not a care in the world as Jake tickled me mercilessly. It had been from nearly a year ago, during one of Jake's long weekend stays.

Also, he had put a sub subject to the picture that read, "This smile rescued me". I had wanted to ask, but I didn't. I wasn't sure I could deal with the implications and he never offered an explanation, so it was forgotten. That day I was happy to realize that our paths had crossed before, prior to that sunny day on the beach, only he had noticed me instead.

Basically, Jasper had been drawn to our own devil-may-care attitudes he had captured with his camera during that time and his eyes had been irrevocably glued to us ever since without his noticing it. Thinking we had been in a boyfriend and girlfriend relationship, he had watched over Jacob's and my bond with a longing that bordered on the thresholds of jealousy.

Like a drowning man choking on water and struggling for his next breath, Jasper overlapped himself over the two of us, pretending that our happiness was his own. Allowing himself to bask in the mirror image of something he could never imagine having, only in a dream or experience through the medium of Jacob's and my mutual happiness when together he could pretend. Like he had finally found the shape of happiness. Something he'd confessed to in the shyest of ways, which had brought the first butterfly flutters to my stomach.

Still, everything I learned thereafter and the longer I knew him, the further into him I was drawn, making me want to learn more about Jasper than the little I already knew. There was nothing I would have wanted him to change about himself. All that suffering he'd allowed me to spy a handful of times had shaped him into the one person had set my heart racing for the first time and would later destroy it with his disappearance.

After all, it had been that Jasper I had met and fallen in love with –the one that smiled, was nice because he was hurting and couldn't bear to inflict his pain on someone else. I had confessed as much when I'd found out his secret and broken through that fragile shell he had been trying to keep me from seeing through.

Jasper… is someone I could never hold anything against, no matter how resentful his abandonment still made me. I could never blame _him_, just the circumstances. Considering finding out everything I did about his past, being allowed to understand his past, being part of his present, and immediate future is something that I will always treasure.

There's just no way I could ever hold a grudge against him.

Jasper had been the one to show me that I wasn't alone in a world where growing up too fast had been force upon us, because he shared that burden with me –my kindred spirit. Ever since I was able to reach the sink standing on a stool, I had been the one forced to be in charge of taking care of our home and making sure that our bills were paid on a timely manner, living little to no room for being a kid.

My mother was one of those moms, always responsible for everything else in her life other than raising her own child. Sometimes I found myself wondering why she even bothered to take me with her in the first place. When, clearly, her job had always been first for her. My father would have probably done a better job.

Point being, I understood Jasper better than anyone and he had understood me like no other before him, or after him for that matter. We had been two old souls, trapped in frames too young, which had finally found each other and struggled together to try making everyone else understand.

Tried to let them see the years behind our youthful, old eyes to no avail. Still, what we had fought for and what we only wished for was for a chance in which we could revert back to being a pair of normal, thirteen year old kids. But we'd found no way of getting back that which we had lost too early in our short lives through all of our quests.

Together, we had made a promise to give up on giving up…

"_Jasper,__you __really __know __the __true __meaning __of __happiness__…" _I didn't know it at the time, but this words were the wrong words to say and would come back to haunt me, to haunt us.

In spite of this, I failed to protect him from my inquisitions and myself...

"_Jasper, __you__'__re __not __as __happy __as __you __pretend __to __be, __are __you? __But __of __course, __you __know __I__'__m __here __for __you, __right?__" __If __only __I __had __never __asked__… __if __only __I __had __managed __to __walk __away __with __those __words __being __my __last __and __his __hand __on __my __wrist __hadn__'__t __stopped __me. _But really, Jasper's greatest enemy was himself. I just hadn't known it at the time.

"_Bella__… __won__'__t __you __ask __me?__" _Such sad, beseeching eyes, begging me to ask what I wouldn't and couldn't. I wasn't ready. I could feel it in every protesting cell in my body.

"…_I figured you'd tell me when you were ready..."_

"_I __can__'__t __do __that__…"_ These words and their monotony were the start of the lexis that cracked opened the doors to Jasper's world of scars with an ear-splitting screech, a year into our growing friendship. I wish I could have averted my eyes from the sight of his guarded gaze and erase the void within.

If only I hadn't been too wrapped up in trying not to notice how he always avoided the subject of his parents every time I broached it. Probably, I would have noted the skilled aversions and hastily change of subject, then maybe, just maybe, I wouldn't have asked. And I would have remained oblivious to the Jasper that smiled because he lived in a world of constant never ending suffering.

"_Why __not?__"_ _I __wish __the __words __hadn__'__t __come __out __as __a __challenge. _Only, they did and I couldn't take them back as I watched him grow ever distant and turn into the "sanctuary" of the void within.

The silence following my challenge stretched to lengths so unnerving that I gave up waiting for a reply, when he spoke the saddest words yet. In that same impersonal and dethatched manner, he let go of my hand and spoke; _"…__My __father __doesn__'__t __want __to __see __my __face __anymore__…"_

Until that moment, everything about being with Jasper had seemed like a breeze at the beginning. Most of the time I compared him to a breath of fresh air. Easy going and full of lazy, handsome smiles wherever he went, allowing us to feel like the teens our years dictated we were meant to be. And in the span of one moment we couldn't take back, our world became, if I were to give it a color, like the deepest of blues, ruined by my one question.

Words… I hate words. At the best of times, they aren't enough and at the worse of times, they give away too much. If I could have been brave or bold enough to pledge myself to the Devil, I probably would have asked him to take my voice. But like a coward, like a cold you just couldn't shake off, I kept on stubbornly.

"…_Why__…__? __Why, __Jasper__…__? __What __would __make __you __say __something __like __that?__"_ The closer we became and the more I probed, the more obvious it became that there would eventually be nothing more to talk about but the painful memories… the darkest, deepest parts of his guarded heart and soul. _I __should __have __seen __that__… __and __I __should __have __stayed __away.__ "_Don't _…__don__'__t __say __that__…"_ I'd pleaded, crying and fisted the front of his shirt as I sank to my knees. _"__Jasper, __just __don__'__t __say __something __so, __so _painful_.__" _

I hugged myself as the realization that I had failed him as a friend came crashing down on me, like a merciless monsoon. I should have been able to know. Someway, somehow, I should have seen through the forced smiles and noticed the pain, lying just beneath the crumbling surface. But by then, without notice, his smile had become something painful to look at, even though it shouldn't have.

"…_Okay. __Sorry. __It__'__s __alright, __Bella__… __It__'__s __alright, __that__'__s __why__…" _I didn't believe a word of it, nor did his painful smile fool me, but I let it go and cried because he was comforting _me_when it should have been me comforting _him_. _"__I__'__m __really __grateful __that __you __are __here __for __me, __Bella__…" __Too __late,_ I realized I wasn't been ready or equipped to be part of this war and much less fight. For the first time in my lifetime, I felt insignificant, immature, and immensely young, a child.

In the blink of an eye, two years flew by and with the new high school scene Alice began to slither her way into the outskirts of the picture with unnatural force. She was like a one-woman catastrophe to be reckoned with, unstoppable and unavoidable. Sophomore year also brought along a familiar and welcomed face into the mist of our growing group, Jacob.

Due to the death of parents, Jacob had had no other choice and permanently moved to Phoenix with one of his older sisters to be closer to me, the silver lining in his misery. During the turn of events, Jasper had then started to disappear more often, skipping class, keeping his distance, keeping himself on the outskirts of our friendship, and only interacting with us when necessary, or when only the two of us were alone together.

Sometime, halfway through the end of our two years of Jasper and my friendship, I became aware of a feeling I couldn't quite understand, or put into words. My sleepless nights and reasoning led me to believe that it couldn't be anything other than _love_.

During the last two remaining weeks of what was left of our sophomore year, I found my chance. While making plans for the summer with everyone in mind and on our way home, we fell asleep on the bus. Waking to the sound of the bus driver informing us we had reached the last stop. We had no idea where we were at and it was getting late.

Unable to stop ourselves and given the absurdity of the situation, we began to laugh at our own misfortune. It was a first, falling asleep on the bus and getting lost as a result was comical in a way. Still, I wasn't panicking, I was with Jasper and he would make sure we both got home safe.

I think it was something that Jasper said, but next thing I knew, I was opening my mouth and, finding courage I didn't know I possessed, I confessed, trying to get my feelings across the best I could. I admit. I was a furiously, blushing mess.

"_Jasper__… __I __like __you... __a __lot.__"_ Only, Jasper didn't react any way I expected him to, or anyway I had prepared myself for. _"__In __fact, __I __love __you, __Jasper.__"_ There was none of acceptance or rejection I had been ready for…

Actually, he hadn't been able to react much at all. _"…__What__… __are __you __saying, __Isabella__…__?__"_ It had been the first time I'd ever seen his smiling face crumble into something far more twisted than insufferable pain in two years. _"…__Don__'__t__…"_

He looked horrified and my full name on his tongue was like a hot rod branding my skin, or a gulp of acid I was being forced to swallow, slowly burning a hole through my throat and stomach. It was painful. _Maybe __I __should __have __kept __my __feelings __silent._

Like you see in a Hollywood romance movie, it rained after, the sky matching my gloom, and I managed to find my way home in a daze. Without really knowing how, I had gotten back home in one piece. Though I felt like I was falling apart into a million pieces from the inside out.

* * *

_**oOo**_

* * *

The next day, he showed up to class just as the last morning bell was ringing, looking sick, and coughing. He didn't avoid me. Instead, without looking me in the eyes, he apologized, much to Alice's confusion. _"…__I__'__m __sorry __about __yesterday__…__.__"_ His apology was worse than his none-rejection and something I could have done without. _"…__I __just __didn__'__t __know __what __to __say, __I __reacted __badly. __If __my __actions __hurt __you,__I __am __sorry.__"_ I felt like the villain. _"__I__'__m __so __sorry.__"_

"_Bella, __what'__s __he __sorry for__?__"_ Alice asked, looking between us, unaware. _"__Am __I __missing __something? __What__'__s __going __on?__"_ We ignored. There was no reason for her to get involved. This was something between the two of us alone, nothing to get an outcast involved in. I could tell he agreed.

"_I__'__m __the __one __who__'__s __sorry!__" _I tried to refute his apology, because it probably should've been me doing the apologizing instead, seeing as I had imposed my feelings on him. _"__You__… __don__'__t __have __to __say __anything. __It__'__s __what __you __felt, __Jasper. __More __importantly, __Jasper, __you don't look so good__…"_ But he would hear none of it.

_"…It's fine."_ How I wanted to believe him, but… it wasn't, I could tell. He walked out of the classroom and after a small hesitation, I gathered my things haphazardly and followed him out.

"_Bella!__"_ Alice called, confused. _"__Where__are__you__going?__"_

"_Jasper, __are __you __going __home?__" _Silence. _"__Good. __Go __home __and get some __rest. __I__'__ll __let __you __sleep __in __tomorrow __as __well.__"_ Still, he'd said nothing as I continued to follow his retreating, silent form… _"…If you're catching a cold you'll need your rest…."_

"_Yeah… that's fine. Thanks for now..." _

We had reached the hallway, when he finally spoke the quiet words that stopped me in my tracks and had me feeling beyond uneasy. With his back still turned to me, he glanced over his shoulder, and looked at me, that same look from the night before twisting his handsome face.

"…_Goodbye, Isabella."_

_When __had __I __last __seen __his __smile?_ Other than the candied picture on my phone, it felt like a while, when it had only been yesterday. A day had never gone by before without a smile from Jasper giving me the strength to face the day with a smile of my own, and now… it felt like I would lose that smile forever.

A jolt ran through me, from the head to the toes at the thought. It'd been like a slap to the face, somehow, that "goodbye" felt like a farewell that would take him out of my life permanently. For a long while, I couldn't do anything but stand there and stare after his defeated back as his silent steps took him farther away from my life and the crowded hallways of our school.

In my panic, like jolting awake from a dream in which you are falling into nothing but endless abyss, my brain restarted and I ran after Jasper…

"…_Goodbye, Isabella."_

* * *

_**oOo**_

* * *

For the first time in my life my inept feet didn't fail me as I put one foot in front of the other and prayed, hoped that I hadn't been set into motion a moment too late.

"_Jasper!__" _Catching sight of him, I called after him as I watched him with a sinking heart step into the public bus that would take him home. He hadn't heard. I called his name louder, _"__JASPER!__" _I didn't have time to waste or think, just action.

I watched as time crawled and he turned in his seat to glance at me, startled, making to stand up and stopping halfway. And then, just as slowly, time picked up again and he turned his back on me, facing the front once again. I wasn't about to give up. I didn't have the luxury to give up. Not when it came to Jasper.

My determined desperation making me quicker, stronger, graceful for once, and much more stubborn than I ever would have thought possible, I continued to chase after him and the bus. It was like the inability to think of a life without Jasper in it was making me unreasonable and unable to leave things the way they were.

"_Jas__… __per__…" _I panted, struggling to breathe so badly that I was barely able to get his name out in one shaky breath as he exited the bus. My knees gave under my feet and I crumbled onto the opposite side walk –my backpack, its contents, my books, and everything sliding off my arms.

"…_Bella__…__?__" _Wide eyed and disbelieving, Jasper stared at me from the other side of the street frozen in place, while I whizzed and heaved, trying to catch a lungful of oxygen.

"…_I__… …__Jas__… __I__…" _Stuttering, I'd struggled to put my thoughts into a coherent pattern of words and form a sentence. _"__Jasper__… …__your __smile__… …__it __makes __me __happy__…" _All I could manage to do was stare at his face, watching the shadows of confusion crossing behind his eyes. _"…__That__'__s __why__… __I _need _to __be __smiling __next __to __you__… __now __and __in __the __future__…"_

Before his face began to crumble along with my fading words, tears were falling down my cheeks freely, leaving me to furiously wipe at them in an attempt to cast them away. It was no use. My heart felt like it was being rolled over shards of broken glass over and over again mercilessly.

Too much. Too raw.

From across the width of road stretched out between us, I saw his hand reach out for me with a trembling hand that became a fist and hesitate. Slowly, folds upon folds of pain began creasing all his handsome features. Before my eyes Jasper crumbled into a crouch on the balls of his feet and covered his face with crossed arms over his head. Effectively withdrawing into himself and hiding from me.

"_I…" _

Personal belongings be damned and forgotten. I somehow found the strength to straighten and make my feet take me across the distance to Jasper, worried. My steps had never felt so hard. I think a horn might have blared past me as I crossed the street and someone might have shouted some crude words in the background, but I didn't cared. None of it mattered.

All I wanted was to be able to cross to his side of the street, close the distance between us, and take his pain away. _If __I __can__'__t __take __him __out __of __whatever __it __is __that __is __going __on, __at __least __I __can __take __him __through __it_,I thought as I reached him, fussing over him with worry.

My hand made to reach for him. _"__Jasper__… __what__'__s __wrong__… __are __you __feeling __ill? __I __know __you __got __caught __in __the __rain __yesterday__… __are __you __oka__–" _

"_Bella, I–"_

Two and a half years ago, at the age of thirteen, Jasper experienced, firsthand the hand that life deals to the ones that simply go with the flow, became damaged, and was forced to live on his own, because…

"_I __killed__…" _He was trembling and his voice was something like a rasp of wind, barely there. I heard it clearly. And at his words, my outstretched hand halted before it could reach him and I froze in place, eyes as wide as a void.

"…_a child…" _

His next set of words was choked, but clear and _shocking_, leaving no room for misunderstanding_._I felt nothing but the rhythm of my heartbeat and heartache pick up double time. I fell to my knees. His words echoing in my head, over and over again, like a sadistic broken record.

"_The __child__…"_ –he tried to swallow–_"…__growing __inside __my __girlfriend__…" _He was trembling so badly now I was afraid to touch him, for fear that he would disintegrate from my touch alone. _"__I __killed __that __child...__" _

I bit back a sob, not wanting to make a sound. Too shocked to make a sound.

"_Because __I __killed __a __human __being, __my __father __said __he __didn__'__t __want __to __see __my __face __anymore__… __so __he __sent __me __here, __where __nobody __would __ask __too __many __questions,__" _He explained, finally lifting up his face and looking at me with such a tortured expression._ "__Since __he __can__'__t __stand __to __look __at __my __face, __he __wants __to __see __me __disappear __too, __just __like __I __made _it _disappear.__" _

I couldn't bear to watch, but I did. Afraid he would evaporate if I didn't, or worse –not let me in. I was beginning to understand many things, suddenly. Seeing the truths behind many unexplainable past behaviors. I understood Jasper.

"_I __didn__'__t __mean __to__… _not really_… __but __I __didn__'__t __say __anything __either__… __I __didn__'__t __stop __her__… __I _couldn't_–" _He was shaking violently and no longer did he hide anything from me, I felt his pain and sorrow as my own. It was breathtaking.

My heart had stopped beating for a painful moment at the sight, tension thick in the air, like the sting of a bee, his tortured gaze pierced me. I couldn't form words of comfort, though the moment called for them. I didn't know what to say to comfort him after confiding something so painful. This was something else entirely, something I hadn't been prepared for and it was like a rude awakening.

In truth, I couldn't have prepared myself for something like this ever. My world had been, to this point, much too guarded to even come up with this scenario as an alternative to something he could have been dealing with. Now, I didn't need to say a prayer to help me not run away. I couldn't even entertain such treasonous thoughts. Not when I knew that I was all he needed right now. Not when I had finally gotten what I had been asking for, his absolute trust. Now that he had given it, I couldn't fail him like that.

However, I couldn't say anything. But my mind was screaming at me, telling me to argue and show him that it hadn't all been his fault and that the darkness didn't have to win as long as his heart remained open to me. All he wanted was for me to hold him and say the words that would heal his heart. I knew that, still, I needed to hear more in order to know _what_to say and say it right.

"_What __would __make __me __happy__… __is __their __forgiveness, __Bella. __But __I __know __I __can__'__t __have __that__… __I __know __I __don__'__t __deserve __forgiveness, __still, __I __long __for __it__… Is that so wrong? Is that __so __despicable?" _He looked at me desperately, asking questions he didn't want answers to. He had already convinced himself that he was undeserving, therefore it was redundant to even answer. I hated it. "_Do __you __understand? __Because __of __me, __someone __died! __How __can __you __even __stand __there __and __look __at __me __after __hearing __this without running away!__" __He __accused, __half __wondering __and __half __angry.__ "__Can __you __still __say __that __you __love _me_ –__a __murderer!__" _

Definitely.

Leaving him and his words hanging between us, I stood and walked to the other side of the road. Making my way to where I had dropped my backpack, along with my spilling books after trying to catch up to Jasper. Simply trying to get away from his words and prostrated form, in order to make sense of everything he had told me.

Only, Jasper was the one doing the chasing now. He followed slowly behind me, as if drained of his own will. Jasper remained quiet as I tried to gather my books and put everything back in my backpack, while he held it open for me. Swallowing the lump in my throat, I faced Jasper.

He looked like Atlas, holding the weight of the world on his shoulders. Except, Jasper was only human and just fifteen years old. Meaning, he had been carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders, all on his own, since he was thirteen for two years, with a fake smile to fool the masses. Myself included.

"_But__…" _The tears I had been holding back started falling out of nowhere, as I stuttered out the word. My throat was so dry it burned to speak. _"__What __about __your __wound, __Jasper?__" _I was crying so much that my tears wouldn't stop. How could I have been so blind to his pain for two years and still call myself his friend?

"…_Wound?__" _he asked me, looking so confused, startled even, and dumbfounded. Then he said the most painful words of all. _"__Do __I__… __have __something__… __like __that?__" _I cried harder still.

Taking his hand in mine, I shouldered my backpack, and started down the street, away from the crowd we were attracting. He didn't speak, he just followed, allowing me lead and take him away. Trusting me.

"…_Your… wound… …all that guilt… it's rapidly consuming you… all that blame you've been putting on yourself… that's your wound, Jasper…" _

More and more tears kept on falling as I spoke, quickly avoiding and moving through the crowd, but there was only silence behind me. The silence stretched on and the only sign I had that he had heard me at all was his hand on mine, which had grown tighter.

"…_And __it __seems __like__… __it __will __take __you __more __than __a __life __time __for __you __to __get __over __it. __Her __wound__… __is _nothing_, __compared __to __yours...__"_

Suddenly as if I had slammed face first into a wall, I was falling backward and onto the floor on my behind, yanked to the ground by his hold on my hand as Jasper collapsed.

"_Jasper__… __Jasper, __are __you __okay? __I__'__m_–_"_ The desperation in my voice was suffocating as I shuffled awkwardly on the floor to stare at Jasper, sprawled on the ground with his left arm covering his eyes and a frown on his lips.

"…_Sorry__…" _I could see the tears making their way down his cheeks from behind his arm. _"…__Sorry__… __everyone__… I'm s__orry__… __Sorry__…" _I don't know how long we stayed there as people passed us by, giving us occasional, curious glances, with Jasper sprawled on the floor and I kneeling, watching over him, or much less how many times he echoed his apology.

"…_What __about __yourself?__"_ I asked him after a moment in which Jasper was no longer laying on the ground, but leaning against me and I was holding him to me as he cried, anchoring himself to me. We stared at each other, sharing the weight of the pain he couldn't let go for so long. All along, he had been unable to forgive himself, carrying the weight of his sin alone.

"_I didn't know…."_

At the time, it had been unfathomable that he had been keeping something so painful all to himself. And I couldn't help but want to help him save himself, if only by offering him the hand that could pull him out of the pit.

"_Jasper, let's go home… let's go where you've been longing to go."_

I took him to my home and we took turns in the shower. I cooked, and we ate in silence. After, I booked us flights to Texas for that up coming weekend. It was, in my opinion, past time for him and his parents to reconcile. It hadn't been easy, but Jasper held tight to my hand throughout the whole encounter, acquiring his strength through borrowing my strength and support over the course of three days. There had been screaming, angry insults that no one truly meant, and tears a plenty, but the trip had been worth it.

By the end of the emotional rollercoaster, Jasper's parents asked for a bit more time, but they wanted him back home. It had been my time to balk then, but I held my tongue. If losing Jasper to his parents meant he would be happy, then there was no point arguing that he belonged back in Phoenix with me. However, I didn't have to worry long because Jasper felt the same way.

Meeting half way, Jasper's parents compromised and decided to move to Phoenix instead. That way Jasper would remain in school and would still be a part of my life. I was happy for him.

The only thing we didn't accomplish during that trip was finding his ex girlfriend, unfortunately. But I promised him we had the summer for that.

* * *

**oOo**

* * *

"_To __tell __you __the __truth, __Bella, __I __was really __happy __when __you __told __me __you __loved __me. You have no idea how important you've become to me...__"_ He told me the night of our return home, while at the beach we'd met. _"__That__'__s __why __I __can__'__t __answer __to __your confession __with __this __halfhearted __feelings.__ I don't want to say "maybe" I love you too …__Sorry__… you deserve more than that. ...Sorry..." _I was grateful, but very sad nonetheless. I never had a chance to begin with._ "If I could go back to before _it_ was born... I would do it in a heartbeat and fix everything..."_

"_I __might __not __say __this __clearly, __Jasper, __but __I__'__ve __been __thinking the same thing __for __a __while __now__… __that if it were at all possible, I would like to go back to when nothing had happened yet and__see the same__Jasper __from __before. I would do it without hesitation, or so I thought. __But __honestly, that's a lie. __I __don__'__t __think __that __would __do for me_." Kindly, he remained quiet and listened attentively, though somewhat sadly and growing confused as my words reached him._ "__Because __I __fell __in __love __with __the __Jasper __that's standing right before me today. The one that __overcame __everything from __his __past __with __a __smile __and __tries __hard __to __be __nice __to __others __because __he's__wounded.__" _He was so surprised at my words it was almost comical._ "…__I __hope __you __find __someone __soon," _I added honestly, smiling sadly._ "I really do." _I turned away from him to hide my tears._ "S__omeone __that __can __over come __everything __with __you, __and __can __jump __with __you __over __everything.__"_ Though I wanted to be that someone…

_Bye, __Jasper__…_ I whispered into the night as I ran away. Making my way to the cement curb that divided the road from the beach, I watched as Jasper searched frantically for me under the full moon. I took my eyes from him for a moment as tears clouded my vision and looked to the starry sky, wishing for Jasper's happiness. Wishing that I had the strength to walk away from him.

Suddenly, a hand wrapped around my wrist and Jasper was climbing over the curve before me and startling me out of my skin. He took both of my hands in his and kissed my knuckles. I stared at him, astounded, and he stared back, a contemplative look in his eyes, almost measuring.

"_Can __I __seriously__… __fall __in __love __with __you? __Bella, __is __it __okay?__"_ He asked me. _"__For __me __to __still __fall __in __love __with __you?__"_ I stared at him, dumbfounded as my tears overflowed and my heart began to race with a stutter. He hugged me tightly to him for a long time as I cried with joy and I held on just as tightly.

"_Nothing __would __make __me __happier__…"_ I answered honestly, blushing.

All our claims to freedom eventually became these heavy chains. Because we refused to be part of the ones that wondered what we might have lost because we chose to never know. I was like a silent agreement had been established; we _needed_ to know in order to keep our sanity. I had needed to know if I was capable of finding his heart, and he needed to know if I was capable of holding his heart, needed me to say the words that could heal his heart.

He craved my voice to help him not fall away and to remind him who he was –who he is. He was aware that if he closed his heart to me then, the darkness would have had its way.

In the end, we never got our answers in full. But we gave it our best. Slowly he began to trust, opening up, and with many tears shed that softened his foundations, I was able to gradually dig deeper until I discovered his heart, and got closer to hearing his hopeful palpitations.

After that, he'd remained there, always in the picture. I'd experienced all of my first times alongside him. And I'd been there for him, trying to earn a place in his heart that no one else could ever replace.

Then, I truly had believed that I had earned that place. I could only hope that it was still true now. I honestly believed that he would be my first and my last. So very naïve I was back then. I had been a moth attracted to Jasper's brightly burning flame, willing to burn to feel that passion he offered.

And then, Jasper took everything I had given him the moment he and his family disappeared without a trace… taking my heart and soul with him.

* * *

Ever since then, I had lived my days trying to avoid anything to do with falling in love. And I wanted to keep it that way, there was enough drama in my life to last me a lifetime without adding a man to the equation and complicating things even further. Besides, I liked the freedom that being single entitled me with; I had no one to answer to but myself. But of course, no one can truly escape love. Good thing I've been stumbling most of my life, eventually I learned how to fall.

My case was different in its singularity and yet I still remained the same Isabella Swan. At least that is what I have been telling myself, that I was okay, but it all had been shattered. I was now tattered and torn beyond repair.

I felt _bruised_.

I am the _broken_.

And my mother, Renee, had been the cause of it all. It should not have surprised me, really. Did she not see that I loved the ground upon which I stood, though wobbly at times, the one that she so unceremoniously wrenched from beneath me?

What at one point I had thought stable had suddenly crumbled down right before my eyes, right on top of me and now… I had no solid ground upon which I could stand. Nor did I have someone to help me ground myself again. Despite the fact that I had amazing friends like Alice and Jacob, they just couldn't understand what was going on.

However, around them, I've perfected deceit. Even I believe I'm above saving. No one can save me. I would never let anyone see just how used I felt. It would take me falling to the ground, to admit to fully needing saving. I haven't reached rock bottom, not yet. I think I've reached that point in which the lines begin to blur. Just before breaking point, though, and yet I have not called out for help. Stupid pride. Comes before the fall, or so I've been told.

"Come save me," I whispered, begged, to no one in particular, as my eyes blur and a single tear slides down my cheek, staining it with its salty trail in the process. I laugh bitterly as I furiously wipe the tear away, glad that no one is sitting beside me to see me cry. But of course, I could only whisper this desperate plea for help to the winds.

My pride wouldn't allow me to cry out to anyone. It would never let me admit that I am the broken, the bruised, and the poor ones, though I've been used. No matter how much I cried, or how often, my tears always felt so out of place. Always sliding so carelessly, revealing the nature of my tortured soul to a world of mocking eyes that constantly judges you before turning their back on you.

_Why __does __it __take __so __much __to __bring __me __to __my __knees?_

After so much pain, I finally see that strength is only found when I am on my knees. Still, it's hard to admit that I am weak, to see that I am weak. I finally understand that this road I've taken is hard. Everything I've sacrificed has shown me this truth.

I wish I were blind to these angry truths. Bruising truths. For who would have thought that the person I trusted most would be the one to shatter my world. Unbelievable, the very world that that same person had helped me build had been dismantled by her own two hands, through the maddeningly slow course of half-truths that had begun to deteriorate upon closer inspection.

My world, too filled with lies, had finally caught up with me.

As I processed these thoughts, I felt the walls around me closing in on me as euphoria engulfed me and I began to feel nostalgic. These feelings were so suffocating. I felt like at any given moment, I would simply begin to throw up, asphyxiate, and then pass out. I saw myself pale on the reflection of the glass window and as I clenched my hands on my seat, I began to tremble over the tight hold.

_Breathe __Bella, __breathe, _I told myself as my memories flashed back to me. My vision tainted red and black, as it so frequently did these days, I recalled in vivid detail the most shocking phone call of my premature lifetime.


	2. Into Paralyzing Silence

**A/N: **_Please, remember, this story is rated _M.

* * *

**Sweet Revenge You've Lied Again**

– **Chapter2: **_Into __Paralyzing Silence, to Face the Ugly Girl_

_My world too filled with lies had finally caught up with me due to a screw up. As I processed these thoughts I felt the walls around me closing in on me as euphoria engulfed me and I began to feel nostalgic. These feelings were so suffocating that I felt as if at any given moment I would simply begin to throw up, asphyxiate, and then pass out. I saw myself pale on the reflection of the glass window and as I clenched my hands I began to tremble under the tight hold I had on my sit._

_Breathe, Bella, breathe, __I told myself as my memories flashed back to me, the most shocking phone call of my lifetime._

* * *

I had known of my parents and their unorthodox divorce, given that my mother had walked out on Charlie, my father, when I had only been two years of age, and had taken me with her to a sunnier region. Leaving behind a devastated Charlie and the gloomy home of Forks where she had grown, loved, married, and dismantled a few hearts, in the process that of the man who loved her most and would have given her the world had she asked for it.

I never did judge her for what she did, yet I couldn't help but feel that she had done it the cruelest of ways imaginable, leaving Charlie in a completely irrevocable state of brokenness. However, despite the bad water and closets full of skeletons, eight years later, I had still been in contact with my loving father, whom I loved and held dearly to heart. I loved how he never pried, unlike my mother, but always seemed to understand just how to treat me, we had an unspoken agreement of sorts that would grow every summer I visited –I smiled wistfully at the sweet memory. That is, until my mother told me of his untimely death, I never asked for any details, knowing that the knowledge would only add to the heartache and increase its severity, making it worse and unbearable. As was the knowledge that the last time I had talked to him we had had an inconsequential fight, but a fight nonetheless. It had been silly, really, just me telling him that for a change he should be the one coming to visit, apparently I shared my mother's views of Forks. The town _was _too eerie and gloomy for my summer vacations, always raining down on my plans, literarily.

Then, at that tender teenaged age, I believed my mother and I kept no secrets from one another, it wasn't until another eight and half years later that I found out how erroneous I was about this particular frame of thought. Meaning that about a month ago, I had answered the phone call that had thrown my world out of sorts, with its every structured proportion dismantled in a heart wrenching tug from its firm skeleton of a structure up and out.

It had been a nurse calling, she had a very sickening sense of humor or so I had thought.

"_Hello? Bella Swan speaking,"_ I had answered chirpily.

Said nurse, had had informed me, once I had answered the phone, that Chief Officer of Forks, Charlie Swan, had had a heart attack and that upon trying to contact his immediate family and coming up to a short chase the hospital had decided to call its last resort, the ex-wife. I remembered the eerie bitter laugh that had escaped my lips then, her words gnawing at the still festering wound, and how I stated to the ignorant nurse that she must have been mistaken, that my father had died almost nine years ago.

"_Oh… I –I am so sorry," _she had apologized, stuttering as she went, the atmosphere suddenly becoming heavy on the other end of my receiver as my guard opted itself to a brick wall in self defense. Serves her right, I had thought darkly, clutching at my slowly ripping heart from which guilt and sorrow had been slowly flowing from in that lazy-quick fashion that sand seems to sip through the small cavities of a hole –like that of an hourglass. Silence had compelled full rein, unobstructed by its uncomfortable heavy and dreaded feel.

"_But, are you not Isabella Swan?" _she had then asked, persisting, all the while oblivious to the festering wound she was probing at with her here and there unprocessed pinches of burning salt.

"_Yes,"_ I had admitted tersely with gritted teeth, my voice small and my eyes closed as I fought to control the mournful tone that had sipped into my voice and the treacherous tears that threatened to fall over their quickly flooding threshold.

"_Then,"_ she continued, sounding more confident and business like, I did not like it,_ "is Chief Officer, Charlie Swan, here, at Forks station, not your father?"_

"_Yes,"_ I repeated even more weakly. My world had then caved in as it was sent spiraling away from under my feet with sickening speed and my knees gave in under its weight as I fell to meet a seemingly nonexistent floor, but to my horror and utter astonishment my knees had met the hard, cold stone, floor. My breathing quickened as I tried to remember how on earth to use my lungs in order to remember how to inhale and exhale –and just when I was about to succumb to the ostensibly welcoming indefinite darkness–

"_Hello?"_ rang a distinct voice I vaguely recognized from what seemed to be the other end of the receiver on the phone I had apparently been holding, and was still holding. Silence was my only reply, there was nothing to be said, and nothing I _could _have said. I was still trying to process the implication that her one question might sustain and what its meaning might be.

"_Hello, Ms. Swan, are you still there?"_ that same tentative voice implored –still nothing came out of my lips or even gave me the strength to part them to at the very least give way to the vomit like bile that had steadily begun to rise in the form of a strangling cry. A silence more deafening than anything I have ever experienced engulfed me, cutting and cold as black ice.

"_Ms. Swan?" _–this woman had been persistent, I had given her that much credit, however, if it had not been for her, I would have probably lost all of my clinging sanity just then, at that very moment as the implication of her words washed over me in tidal waves of illuminating understanding. _Lies? _I –probably I was not seeing things clearly, yes, that was it!

"_Y –ye –yes… yes?"_ I had finally found my voice, it was hoarse, and it had taken me more than three stuttering tries to summon the three lettered word.

"_Then, clearly, you will do anything on your immediate power to come and check up on him? It hit him hard this time around…"_ she questioned and a short wave of relieve washed over me as I noticed that she seemed to ignore my "sound" statement of "my father has been dead for nearly nine years," then terror sipped in. "This time around,"_ had there been other attacks?_ _"Having a family member around might just help improve his condition greatly, especially if it's the daughter,"_ she added hastily, as if sensing my refusal.

"_I–" _Truth was I had no idea as of what to do, the minimal. Should I go and see my apparently –still-alive- father, Charlie?

Wait –Charlie's alive?!

She lied to me, _my _mother, lied to me– My head swayed in tides of crimson as I processed the probabilities and possibilities of the woman who raised me and claimed to be _my _mother doing such things. I never did take her for a plotter; she always seemed so innocent, volatile, and child-like, qualities not suitable, in my opinion, for a schemer. Such conspiracy did not befit her, I tried telling myself as a form of berate.

"_I–" _I tried again, getting no further as the entrance door swung open. Speaking –er, thinking– of the devil.

"_Bella, honey, I'm ho–" _One look at my more than normal pale complexion and Renee knew that something was wrong. Worry flashed across her eyes as her brow furrowed at the sight of me holding our house phone with my two shaking arms that were beginning to sweat. With just a moments hesitation she began to walk toward me, apprehension in each of her steps, concern adorning her unsettled features. As she reached me she glanced at the caller ID, her eyes widened. Comprehension dawned on her as she snatched the receiver from my trembling hands. And without a word or a second glance at me she ignored me and my futile attempts at trying to catch her eyes and she had exchanged a few hushed words with the nurse on the other end of our receiver.

My cheeks suddenly burned with a furious blush that threatened to set my skin on fire as shock turned to anger and realization sluiced over me like melted wax –clinging and stinging every whisper of skin it touched. I wanted answers, I wanted explanations and I wanted them _now_.

My _mother _hung up the phone to its rightful place and slowly turned to face me with a frustrated sigh as if trying to show, through her actions, how much she dreaded having the conversation that would undoubtedly ensue, however, I was still fuming and would not show enough leniency to delay the questions burning at the tip of my tongue to which I demanded answers, if not at all.

"_Explain," _I demanded vehemently as my voice shook with barely controlled anger, and the equally angry tears did not help dim the crazed look that haunted my daggering eyes as they threatened to spill over the precipice of their almost unwilling urn that held them back with precocity.

"_Bella–" _she had begun but I had promptly interrupted.

"_Stop it," _I sneered angrily, gritting my teeth. _"Your tone sounds patronizing."_

"_Alight, now you know. I lied, alright?" _she admitted, seemingly without an ounce of guilt, much to my horror and dismay. That was that? No putting up a fight before admitting defeat at being caught in her all her glory of pretense, no nothing? I felt disgusted by her presence, empty by her lack of guilt and quick confession, and I was sure to make an effort of showing how disgusted I was with every crease and frown that I could control and muster all over my features. Still, worst of all, she did not look guilty. She seemed not to find it in herself to show any sign of remorse at the prospect of clamoring dead a man that was not, after clamoring dead for almost nine years the father of her daughter, whom she claimed to love and adore, she still had no compunction to show for it.

"_For eight and a half years, eight and a half years my father has been well and alive, yet you've had me think him dead, mourning him?" _I spat. My voice was raw, hiding none of the fury I felt as my tears fell freely over their lashed precipice and my entire body shook with rage as my fists dug my nails onto my palm, producing a half-moon lining of blood in the process. I ignored it. _"All this time you –you've enjoyed seeing my suffering, pretending to comfort me, and said nothing?" _my voice held no more anger as I said this… I felt tarnished and hurt beyond repair, to the point were I had unconsciously wrapped myself in the comfort of my arms in an attempt to hold my shaking body and chipping heart together as they both threatened to crumble, figuratively and factually.

"_No! Bella–" _

"_Shut up. I'm leaving." _My voice was monotonous now, bushed and seemingly expiring. How tired I felt, I did not even held the strength to glare at her, though it seemed my weak attempt had worked as I watched, with satisfaction, her body cower in response. However, my body seemed not to share my same conception as it shook even more inconsolably, as if threatening to shut down.

"_Where will you go?" _Renee had asked her voice almost a whisper but I had heard her as I shocked her by twirling around, storming to my room, and packing everything necessary within my reach as she stood frozen where she was standing in the living room.

"_Where do you think?" _I spat, my anger resurrected as I emerged from my room fully packed. _"I'm going to see my father, who –who has had to suffer through a heart attack when I wasn't around to do anything… who I haven't seen in almost nine years…" _I almost chocked on the words.

"_We could go toghe–"_

"_Together?" _I laughed harshly in disbelief,_ "Right, Renee, I don't know if you've realized it yet, mother, but right now I am finding the idea of being near you, for a prolonged period of time, hard to digest. I simply don't want to see your face… for a while, and I don't think Charlie would welcome the sight of you either." _With even more satisfaction I saw my mother flinch at my words as I sneered. Right now, I did not wish to think of what Renee might have told Charlie after my phone calls to him stopped their frequency… did he thought me dead, like I thought him? I had pushed my thoughts aside, not wanting to fathom over what kind of damage Renee had inflicted where my father and his condition were regarded.

"_Bella…"_

"_You know, Renee, I _really _wish I could say 'I hate you,' but somehow I can't. Just, don't," _I stated, my words ridden of any emotion, sanguine or pessimist alike, _"so don't push me. I'm leaving and I'm not coming back, send me my things –and don't even dare to think about showing your face at Forks. That's all…" _I then stormed out of the oppressing hose and without looking back, bags and car keys in hand; I made a beeline for my car. Settling my bags in the trunk and sitting on the drivers sit I ignited the car's engine to life and made a speedy get away, surprised by my lack of hazardous-klutziness I took the express way that would take me to my best friend's home. Only stopping to call Alice and Jacob, my two best friends, currently dating, in the process explaining what had happened. And out of courtesy, more than anything else, I sought for their permission to crash their place until I booked my flight. They agreed, more than sympathetic of my situation, actually, they reacted even more enraged than I thought they would. After agreeing to meet them at their place I sat in my car, for I don't know how long, and my composure fell as I crumbled with sobs and my heart ripped its chipping walls apart. With much effort, after I had my much needed break down, I drove quickly to Alice's where I yet again crumbled in her and Jake's arms as they tried to put me back together –comforting me.

The next day Alice, ever so efficient, had informed me that she had taken it upon herself to book three flights to Forks after my call. I protested, saying that they didn't need to drop everything for me and that they especially did not need to go to Forks but I lost _that_ battle, I never did have a chance against Alice anyway. Her argument had been too sound, saying that if they let me go alone I would probably just fall apart, loose it, and maybe even lose the courage to face my father and care for him. She knew me well, too well, _that_ was a given. Defeated I agreed and the three of us went to our hometown. Nonetheless I was greatly thankful for their affection and companionship, they were the greatest friends I could ever ask for, or anyone could ever ask for.

And so, that, serving as a cause, is what has brought me here, to Rome… my new form of get away. The idea of a get away had been mine, however, like everything else, Alice had taken it upon herself to improve it just a notch –as she would put it– and suggested a trip to Europe and I readily accepted the idea. And when the day had finally come to make my get away a reality Alice had practically shooed me all the way the airplane, too bad she was not allowed pass security or she would have done just that –she probably would have buckled my seatbelt and then, demand that someone bring me the best brandy as well. That was Alice alright, your own personal enigma. I shook my head and chuckled, my best friends, where would I be without them by my side?

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**A/N: **_Well, that's another chapter. What's the verdict so far, do you want to kill me for making Jake and Alice a couple? Don't worry too much though, Jasper will come, she just hasn't met him yet! And I thought it was a sort of sense making idea, given that her visions seem to stop with Jake around, giving her peace of mind… that's my reason for the momentarily pairing. I hope you guys found some parts of this chapter… at the very least, shocking. Any questions for me? PM me, leave it on the review and I'll be more than glad to answer them. _

_Anyway, leave a comment –or your disapproval by submitting a review! Thanks for reading. _


	3. A Million Voices Breaking Silence

A/N: Please, remember, this story is rated M

**A/N: **_Now, another chapter and a bit of a… __**hot**__ moment coming its way, maybe this chapter or next; Rated _**M**._ So, for this chapter, anything you see in italics is said in Italian and anything that follows after the inserted colon is the translation. For those of you that do know Italian, don't be so hard on me if there are any mistakes, kindly let me know, I'm doing this with an online dictionary! With that clear, please enjoy this chapter!_

**Sweet Revenge You've Lied Again**

– **Chapter3: **_A Million Voices Breaking Silence Still _

_And so, that, serving as a cause, is what has brought me here, to Rome… my new form of get away. The idea of a get away had been mine, however, like everything else, Alice had taken it upon herself to improve it just a notch –as she would put it– and suggested a trip to Europe and I readily accepted the idea. And when the day had finally come to make my get away a reality Alice had practically shooed me all the way the airplane, too bad she was not allowed pass security or she would have done just that –she probably would have buckled my seatbelt and then, demand that someone bring me the best brandy as well. That was Alice alright, your own personal enigma. I shook my head and chuckled, my best friends, where would I be without them by my side? _

_"__Arrivare__ a Coliseum Prefecture_," the overhead intercoms announced throughout the train's cabins, snapping me out of my trance like state.

I do not know how long I sat on my train ride but I can tell you this, I must have circuited the ride twice before I came back down to reality and noticed that I had reached my stop, probably for the second time. The silence had finally been broken, like the racketing of millions of voices –and yet, all was still within my mind and self. There was no need to be silent. I could speak again.

_Meraviglioso_, now I could reach my hotel and get some much needed sleep; also known as de-clouding.

Realizing that this was my stop I quickly jumped up, grabbed my luggage and swiftly made my way out –you didn't really believe that, now, did you?– me, being me, somehow managed to get my foot tangled on one of my bags unhelpful belts and began to fall. Closing my eyes shut tight and brazing myself for the inevitable fall that was fast coming I shifted my small body so that my hands would stop my fall.

"_Stai attento__!_: Be careful!"

And so, it came, or did not –_curious_, my landing was soft, warm, and, somehow, sturdy all at the same time. Even more curious I felt as if I had finally reached the comfort of my home. I dared not open my eyes nor breathe –I swear I felt arms around my waist! The thought was not a pretty one, despite the fact that whoever it was _had_ saved me.

"_Ohi_… _Hai fatto una stupidaggine_: Ouch… That was a stupid thing to do," said a masculine velvety voice from –_under me_– in a beautiful Italian that I wished I understood. _"Ehi, mogliettina, sei tu...: _Hey, little woman, are you..." The drive to find out who possessed such mesmerizing voice, compelled me to dare and open my eyes… very slowly as I dared let out the breath that I had been holding. The person under me seemed not to breathe either as I shifted slightly over him.

Carefully, opening one eye at a time, I gazed up into the most amazing green eyes I had ever seen staring straight at me and my auburn brown eyes. Upon our eye contact my rescuer seemed to let out a shaky breath and I continued my inspection of his eyes with unabashed scrutiny. _Home_, was the one word that came to mind as I gazed markedly into his mesmerizing eyes, and the thought didn't seem to tug at my heart as it had done not too long ago, just barely hours and minutes ago.

"_Cazzate..._: Crap…" my rescuer murmured under his breath, or something that sounded like it as he too stared into my eyes. But I did not care, I still did not understand a word he was saying and I was too speechless to form any variety of coherent words, much less a sentence.

Did such bright eye color really exist? They were like the color of soft, evenly dispersed rich honey strokes woven meticulously with the bright green only seen on new born grass, freshly drizzle upon by nature –these twin pools of evergreen were breathtaking. And I was lost, lost in reach temperate twin forests at twilight –funny, how I was so lost and, yet, felt like I was finally home. I shook that idea away with a small tremor that never seemed to catch his eyes. I needed to continue, I needed to get even more lost… Could I dare, again? I dared, once more, and took in the rest of the face of my rescuer as best I could, in the position I was in. Which, now that I realized, ought to look compromising at the very least, and yet I could not find it in me to care for he seemed to be mirroring my actions.

And to tell you that I was mystified by what I encountered in his face would almost be a lie. There were simply no words in this entire world or in any dictionary with the right meaning or connotation to describe the beauty I was staring at –none would achieve him justice. They would fall short, by _several _fractions. His face was pale, not as pale as mine but a definite close second, his brow deep, just the right thickness, and defined. His hair, which I wanted to run my fingers through, was in faultless disarray atop his head and a shade of auburn lighter than that of his defined brows, looking as soft as feathers. And to top it all of, the characteristic design of every line that defined his perfectly smooth looking face was straight, in every angle –perfectly squared, angular jaw, horizontal nose, with just the right length, and high, defined cheeks that helped further articulate just _how_ masculine his face was –is. Masculine but not rough, beautiful but not in the feminine sense of the word, and everything a heavenly being should be –lucid in his simplicity and exquisiteness.

"_Sbrigati__ con __quello,__ per __piacere__! T__u ancora sopra__di__mi..._:Please, get a move on! You're still on top of me…" The heavenly creature with evergreen eyes said from, still, underneath me –nastily and rudely I may add –but that voice… it was to die for! I frowned, as I assumed what he must have been saying. Mulling over his tone of vice and realizing how rude his voice sounded –regardless of the beauty in it. However, I was still in awe of him, despite the boiling lava of steaming anger I was trying to simmer down within me so as not to tarnish the moment, or was it illusion. It was like black and red velvet laced and woven intricately together somehow managing to smear like hot, protuberant, magma with its smooth vibrations, as if embroidered with the naked sound of _sex_ . As my own thoughts turned to misleading places I felt the _on cue_ blush approaching … yup, there it was –_treacherous_ blood pools! I'm not vehement, or bitter, I swear.

"_Fottere_…: Fuck…" he breathed and swallowed -joy, a new word that I know not the meaning of, note the _sarcasm._

I blushed, a piercing crimson and struggled upon fumbles to scurry and stand on my own inept two feet without much success –it was a mortifying embarrassment.

"_Cazzate..._: Crap…" there went _that_ word again…

"_Scusa__!_: Sorry!" I apologized, saying one of the very few Italian vocabulary words that I knew in, what I assumed, was very bad Italian –at least compared to _his _–still struggling here, you know! In the end I almost gave up and he simply grumbled some more Italian, which, even to my inept and acclimatized Italian ears, sounded like incoherent words and set me, roughly, on my own two feet.

"_Ecco qua_: There you go," he amended effortlessly, once I was upright. I tried to form the two word phrase that would entertain my gratitude but my voice failed me as did words –I was still speechless. Was it really a _person _standing before me, if not, was it a mythological creature?

"_È un __bell'uomo__, __vero__?_: He's handsome, isn't he?" I heard a young woman say to another, wondering what _she _was saying as the other seemed to agree.

"_Distratto__…_: Dreamy…" the other sighed, in agreement I suppose. _Evergreen_ seemed to dislike what he was hearing because he simply looked irritated and on the verge of grimacing.

"_Anche__ se, __oi__ non __posso__ dire la __stesso__di__lei._: Even though, I can't say the same for her," the first woman said, eyeing me suspiciously.

"_Sono__ solo _oi_,_: It's only _me_," he grumbled to himself, frowning, as he turned his attention back to my eyes, rather than the floor he had previously been scowling at.

"_Gelosa__?__Che__ fare?_: Jealous? What's to be done?" the other woman seemed to mock as _Evergreen _looked murderous, though, thankfully, not at me.

"_Cosa__vorresti dire?__ Se __fossi__ in __te__…_: What are you talking about? If I were you…"

I wondered, not for the first time, what was being said that angered him so much, and why were those women looking at me so maliciously. That had to be it, he was a creature of sorts from places unknown to mankind _and_ womankind –especially women like me– he _must_ be from the Netherlands, there simply was no other explanation plausible enough to appease my unease. The man before me, _my _rescuer has beauty and elegancy beyond words, words that seem to fail me and scatter with every attempt at coherency –I was never one to be at a loss for words, it was happening too often lately, too often for my liking.

"_Scusa__!_: Sorry!" I apologized, again, bringing his attention back to earth.

"_Sputa fuori!_: Out with it!" _Evergreen_ snapped, making me feel resentful as I stared at him feeling slightly foolish for not understanding what he was saying –I felt dumb beyond words. Tears sprung to my eyes but I fought them back as I pressed my lips in a tight line. "_Non __importa__!_: No matter!" Apparently my reaction had made him remorseful but nonetheless, not less snappish, but a bit gentler. "_Devo cambiare treno__, prima __di_ _lasciare, più_: I need to change trains before it leaves, again," he seemed to try and explain as he started to retrieve, I needed to stop him.

"_Aspetta__ un __momento!_:Wait a moment!" I couldn't believe I even remembered how to say that!

"_Lasciami in pace!: _Leave me alone!" _Evergreen_ bellowed back as he swiftly left the train –damn, he was graceful too. Sighing, I too followed out after getting some nasty smirks from the two women who had, apparently, been previously talking about me. Once outside I twisted every which way, trying to pint point him, _Evergreen_, but he was nowhere to be found, it seemed.Cursing him, his rudness and all his unecessary beauty I made my way to what I hoped was the direction of my hotel, the_ Hotel __Anfiteatro__Flavio_. 

_Preziosa__ ed bella_: precious and beautiful, were the only two words that seemed to run through _ Evergreen's _mind as he made his way to work that morning. He had missed his first stop this morning, too engrossed in the brunette beauty five seats away from him to move, she had been crying as he had passed by her seat earlier. And he couldn't comprehend as to why, but for some rear reason seeing her like that caused his insides to churn and twist –he wanted to make her hurt better, anyway he could… so why had he treated her so badly, back there, when he had rescued her? She spoke beautifully too and he did not even know her name –_ Preziosa_, he would deem her, for now, until he learned her name. _  
_

**A/N: **_Well, that's another chapter. Encounter with__ Evergreen! Who on earth could he be?! Lol _

–_Anyway, leave a comment –or your disapproval by submitting a review! Thanks for reading. _


	4. Former Epoch, Overlooked

_**A/N**__; *__Ahem__* I know, sorry, I've been a long time coming but I'm serving up the next chapter now so…. Let it go? Hope this one is as good as the last one, if not better. It is not perfect but… better this than having you wait any longer. Now, please, Read and enjoy!!_

* * *

**Sweet Revenge You've Lied Again**

**-Chapter4: **Former Epoch, Overlooked

_Previously;_

___Preziosa__ ed bella_: precious and beautiful, were the only two words that seemed to run through _Evergreen's _mind as he made his way to work that morning. He had missed his first stop this morning, too engrossed in the brunette beauty five seats away from him to move, she had been crying as he had passed by her seat earlier. And he couldn't comprehend as to why, but for some rear reason seeing her like that caused his insides to churn and twist –he wanted to make her hurt better, anyway he could… so why had he treated her so badly, back there, when he had rescued her? She spoke beautifully too and he did not even know her name –_ Preziosa_, he would deem her, for now, until he learned her name.

* * *

On my way to the _Anfiteatro Flavio_ Hotel, as I hoped above hope that my sense of direction hadn't left me yet, I came to a sudden realization of something vital, something that I had _overlooked_. My tongue danced behind my lips, wrapped with curses as its own unique mantra was formed as a result of my frivolous, angry stride in what seemed to be a language of its own volition. Amidst all my pondering-awe and cursed muttering, as I walked the across the crowded cobalt-cobbled streets of Rome, I had been too engrossed on my criticism of how _rude_ and _imprudent_ my "rescuer", _Evergreen_, had just been. Enough to not realize the missing factor –of the perfect equation that was him– until, alas, it was too late.

And _that _is why I had halted abruptly on my feet and my right hand had gone flying at an alarming speed toward my forehead, slamming its flat palm against my forehead's paleness, with a loud and resounding _smack_. _Isabella Swan, how could _you _have been so obtuse as to not realize that you had overlooked such an important entity of such a great being's essence?!_ _How could you have _missed _admiring his lips!_ _Those lips that I should be spending hours upon hours antag–ENOUGH! _

I could have cried out of frustration and desperation then. Only, I had almost formed a new mantra as realization took in over fascination –stating, clearly, that men like _Evergreen _did not even deserve a second thought, there was just no time for me to spare on him when I had so much of _Rome _to explore.

With an indignant, _Humph!_ I resumed my purpose filled stride, only to realize that I _might _just have been lost –I had not been, really, paying attention to where I was going after all.

With a little irreverent sigh that attracted a few passerby's glares and curiosity I decided to stop and ask for directions –right, how was I going to do that, this just keeps getting better and better. I _was _lost, against my better judgment. Trying to rack my brain away from any thoughts that led to mysterious green eyes and copper hair I began reorganize my minds _Italian _dictionary, so as to ask for directions.

Right, first things first, I need to make a halt to my steps. And as I did so I realized how big of a mistake _that _was.

"_Siamo spiacenti, per favore mi scusi, che e stato stupido,!: Sorry, please excuse me, that was stupid," _I apologized over and over to the person I had inevitably made a victim of my daily routine of clumsiness, a painful one at that.

"_No, per favore, non scusiamo, e 'stata interamente colpa mia, ho avuto improvvisamente_….: No, please, do not apologize, it was entirely my fault, I had suddenly…" the person I had made a victim of my blunders seemed to say in turn.

"No, I– " it was not the fact that I had completely forgotten to continue my apology in the appropriate language, Italian, that made me halt abruptly on my ramblings. No, it was the sight before me as I took in the face of the _stranger_ I had victimized and the fact that, in reality, he was no stranger at all. Heart pounding in my ears I spoke the words of a name I never would have thought possible to say again, _"…J– Jasper, _is it _really_ you_?"_

"_B– …Bella,_ is that _really_ you_?" _The astounded tremor of his voice, his demeanor, everything about him expressed the same astonishment and delight I was currently feeling, one so unbelievable that neither of us could commence to explain. The taste of his name on my tongue and the sound of mine on his was one filled with a strange hint of ecstasy and melancholy. Strong enough to make me remembered our good times together. He had, after all, been my first kiss and I his…

I couldn't hold back anymore, the silence was too much, there could not be a moment wasted, dropping everything I was holding I launched myself at him and his arms spread for a welcoming embrace, "God, _Jasper! _It is so great to see you! It has been too long…"

"Bella, Bella..." was all Jasper could say, over and over again my name rolled off his tongue as he held me in a tight embrace that left little room for breathing, much less for escaping. The love and adoration with which he said my name bringing tears to my eyes giving me the strength I held on tightly to him and his warm embrace as Jasper seemed to do the same.

I don not know how much time eclipsed from that moment to the time when his voice cut across the crowded silence and his next words. What I do know is that I had missed my Jasper terribly and that I was sure he had missed me as much.

"It _has _been too long Bella…" his voice, so tender and caring cutting through a seamless eternal moment was something that could not have come through at a more appropriate time. "You couldn't _possibly _imagine how _much _I've missed you," he added holding me at arms length, to better look at me. "I see you're still the same old Bella, quickly moved to tears, minus a few good improvements." With a teasing wink he began to dab at my falling tears, which had hazed my vision, I took the opportunity to ignore his comment and have a few words in. I was still angry at how we parted, more sad than angry really. There had never been a final goodbye after all, one day I had gone up to his house to find that he was simply not there… no previous notice, no nothing.

"You'd be surprised, Jasper Hale, just how much I've missed you, we've missed you. We never even got to say goodbye, much less know where you and your parents had gone! I mean, with our history together you would have thought that you'd at the very least you'd have the courtesy to say a simple goodbye…" My words, though teasing, had apparently done my number on him because as I watched his eyes had turned remorseful and his head had dropped in shame.

"I couldn't… I wouldn't say goodbye, not to you not to Alice, especially not _you. _It would have felt too final," the sadness in his voice pierced my heart like no other words had ever done so, they almost seemed like a confession. "I wanted to at the very least have the hope that some day, no matter how many years it took, I'd get a chance to get back to you, to be back home…" As he said this, his eyes sought mine and there I found the truthfulness of a child's eye that made me take in all of him, and _really _look at Jasper Hale.

That was when I noticed them, truly noticed them, the _scars _that I had been trying so defiantly to ignore, pretend they were not. However, despite them, my Jasper was still there, just as handsome, if not more, than I remembered him those three years ago, scars and all. I realized that no matter what I could accept this man and all his faults. However, the condition and the state my friend was in was certainly not the one he had left in and that troubled me to the point were my entire body felt like crumbling. Most likely, knowing him, like I've know him, he has been keeping all his hurt locked inside so as not to trouble others with what he'd call his petty troubles.

That was the kind of man the Jasper _I _knew was, and unless appearances were deceiving me this time around that was the same kind of Jasper standing before me. Even though he seemed a little more fragile than I last remembered. Then again, he must be thinking the same thing about me. For now… none of these mattered, Jasper needed me, even if I was the worst person to come for consolation in the state I was in I could still mange something, of that I was convinced.

"_Jasper,"_ my lips trembled from holding back my tears as I extended my hand and delicately traced one of his most noticeable scars, the one running just across his high cheekbone to his well defined, golden brow. The gesture was sudden and I almost thought I had seen him flinch but then, ever so slightly, I watched as he came closer to my touch and with apparent trust let his eyes close for what seemed like half a second. But then, as if catching himself, his eyes flashed open; as it was, it gave me the strangest sensation to watch as his eyes, which had been fully taking me in, suddenly become void of life and drift away from my face until he was completely avoiding meeting my eyes.

_What had happened to the man before me, the one I used to know?_ That and many more thoughts and questions crossed across my mind as Jasper turned away from me. Just a simple backward step and he was out of my reach as if he had gone to the ends of the earth to hide from me. The pain I felt at that moment was as if it belonged to the both of us, I felt our hurt combined as one entity.

"Jasper I– I'm sorry…" What more could I have said? Nothing else seemed appropriate.

"Bella," though his back was still to me the small chuckle in his voice as he spoke alleviated some of my fears, "I've always said so but I'll say it gain, you apologize too much. Really, there's nothing for you to be sorry about, I… I was the one that got carried away."

"No–" my argument ceased as I saw him turn to me, the torn expression that held my gaze to his crippling my already crumbling heart in more ways than I would have ever thought possible. All he had to do was shake his golden mane, to bring tears to my eyes and shut me up completely.

"I know that you have many questions for me, I have some of my own to ask you… but, Bella, this isn't the place," he explained tenderly as he whipped away my falling tears with a fluid flicker of his long elegant fingers. I simply nodded my understanding. "It seems I can't still hold my promises around you," he added thoughtfully, perpetually confusing me. "Before I was… gone… didn't I make a promise to never again make you cry?" Sweet, sweet memories, as golden as his hair and as affectionate as the sun's warmth… How could I ever forget?

"Yes… shame on you, Mr. Hale!" I couldn't help but give him a watery smile, a genuine one at that, one that could bring a real smile out of him, even. Who would have thought it could feel so good to just laugh? It was as if everything was gone with a small gust of wind and a cackle.

I do not know how long we stood there laughing, rejoicing in each others laugh, and being looked at funnily by passerby's and not caring, all I know was that when we fell silent once more the pause was not an awkward one –it was just _right. Like old times, _the mere thought bringing a smile to my lips caused me to be the first to break the silence, "Though, everything aside, I must say, Jasper, it is really good to see you… _here, _in Rome!"

"Ha ha! Same goes to you, Isabella, it truly is great to see a _familiar _face in strange lands. Besides, it has been too long and too many things have not been said…" Really, Jasper has been the only one to ever get away with calling me _Isabella, _worse case scenario was that he knew it, and still knew it to this day!

"Mmm… too many things left undone, too many years gone by and yet here we are today talking as if we'd just missed each other for only a day!" It never ceased to amaze me how attuned to my feelings Jasper always seemed to be. It was like he always knew what to say and when to say it, always.

"Indeed, too many…" there it goes again, that painful look that seemed too ancient for a person his age to wear, a person _my _age. "I hope that, if your heart moves you to it, I can recount my tale to you from the moment I left?"

"Jasper, do you even need to ask? You know I've never been one to deny _you _anything, much less something I want to hear." I hoped that my tone conveyed more of what I was feeling than my words ever would.

"Thank you…" his tone, sounding ever so relieved and grateful stirred something inside, something that only Jasper always seemed to be able to stir. It was something that had always remained nameless to me and to him throughout our mutual relationship of none relationship. "And, to answer your question, yes, I do know." Ah! The cheeky responses, how I had missed them… so much so that it brought the old flare to my eyes.

"What are friends for?" I countered in that same cheeky manner that I knew would spark his curiosity into a tease filled challenge of pure cheekiness. "However, Jasper, as great at it is to have found you here the fact of the matter is that I am, still, very much so lost. The previous plan was to ask you if you'd be so kind as to point me in the right direction…" I could not well forget the situation at hand. So might as well retrieve the challenge I had thrown? Since he had seemed to rise to the occasion.

"So unlike the Bella I know! Isabella Swan, lost? Never…" Oh, the way he always manages to tease me! This boy sure has not changed, not one bit! Even though I had retrieved the bone the target seemed to have taken the bait after all… lucky me, notice the sarcasm? "But _of course_, as you know, I am a generous gentlemen who cannot just stand by and do nothing about, clearly, a damsel in distress. So, pray tell, what is it you seek, your object of interest?" was he really trying to get murdered when I just barely gained him back? And adding to the flamboyant display a much too exaggerated bow?!

"Does that mean you don't mind showing me to my hotel, the _Anfiteatro Flavio_ Hotel?" That's right, I was dodging the challenge for my own good.

"That's right, I don't mind at all, anything to spend a little more time with you. So! The _Anfiteatro Flavio_ Hotel, huh? Nice one, I'm staying there myself," Ever so attentive and attractive, swaying me with the full force of his charm, how deceitful of him, making me blush. "And there goes that blush I know so well, the one I've missed seeing ever so much.

"Jasper!" I probably looked like a tomato by now so I really do not know why I was trying to protest so later on.

"There, there, it was only a little tease, and besides the point, I really did mean it. I've missed everything about you, even tearful old Forks and our 'adventures' there." he said with a hearty chuckle as he embraced me in a one-arm embrace.

"Argh! You really have a way of doing me in, cheater!" I said indignantly with a pout as he laughed, probably getting the response he wanted.

"Seriously now, all joking aside, you are quite impressive, Bella, all lost in thought as you were and you _still _managed not to be that far off rout." How had he known? "…I just do, Bella, when it comes to you, I dare say, there's little I miss…"

"Are you trying to kill me by making me blush this much?!?"

"Only because that way you'd reach heaven looking like an angel," he said a little too seriously to actually _be_ serious. Ignoring the comment I merely rolled my eyes at him and chanced a look at my surroundings as he continued to laugh at me. "In all honesty, I really have missed your blushing and the warmth of your honest eyes… I've missed being surrounded by honesty…" There, it was that sadness beyond years, the one I had noticed before that brought me back to him and set the mood from playful to a more serious on and yet not quite awkward.

Turning, my breath was stolen from me; the sight that met me was, in all honesty, magnificent and certainly not the one I had been expecting. His hand was moving towards my face, reaching my ruddy cheeks, which he caressed with a tenderness I could have never forgotten, one that only he possessed –at least I had assumed so– and his eyes, filled with pure adoration. To say that my heart was probably keeping a beat that would go well with a heavy metal song as saying little, it felt like it just wanted to rattle itself out of my being through my suddenly dry throat. He looked _that_ beautiful and ethereal.

"Jasper… we –we should, probably, get going… I mean, I think we're attracting too much attention," I said through the hard lump of nervousness I was trying really hard to swallow. I was not prepared to find out that after all this years he could still affect me like this.

"Huh…?" was his very distracted reply as he cradled my face in his hands, looking as dazed as I was feeling. "Oh… yes, right, I'll take you, but only if you promise to let me in and hear me out?"

I simply nodded and swallowed some more, or tried to anyway as he swiftly took my hand and twining our fingers together led the way.

Our walk to the hotel was a quiet one, nothing was said, we simply enjoyed having the others presence as company and held hands the entire walk to the hotel with our harts rattling against our chests and ears. Simply hoping that the other did not walk close enough to hear the heavy metal composition that had materialized itself within the confinements of our rushing blood readying itself to counter adrenaline.

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_**A/N; Sorry my darlings but this is it for this chapter! Sorry to cut it short when it was getting GOOD… I really do mean it so don't murder me! Still, tune in next to see what happens with this two, and yes this is still a Bella and Edward pairing story, I just have to do a little fan service. I'll promise to tell you what happened in the past with these two, just not now or, I think, any time soon. Anyway, plans have changed a bit for this story but I'll be sure to show you some hot steaming goodness as soon as I can. Liked this chapter so much that you ended up screaming like a giddy high school girl, hated it? Let me know, click that little review monster down bellow to your left!**_


	5. Progress

**A/N: **_It has taken me a long time coming, but here I am, delivering you your new chapter. Hope you guys can enjoy it just as much as you have enjoyed the previous chapters.

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**Sweet Revenge You've Lied Again**

– **Chapter5: **_Progress _

I was aware of several things; one, Jasper's hand in mine as he held me to him from behind, secondly, the warmth of his breath upon my neck that made the beat of my heart accelerate, along with my breathing, and a third, the bell of the elevator announcing our arrival to the fourth floor, I was to be staying on the 21st room. Jasper and I had made light conversation here and there, making up for lost time until reaching the hotel successfully, thanks to Jasper's great sense of direction, hand in hand.

We step out, just as the elevator door slides open, greeting us with the soft glow of the illuminated hallway, silently we go forth. Silence is a warm companion in our step, as loud as the poundings of my heart against my ears. I hesitate, from the corner of my eye I see Jasper sucking in his breath and holding it, and just as I slide my keycard to open the door to my room for the next two weeks, Jasper breathes again.

For a moment I forget how to walk, how to think, how to breathe. We stand there, staring past the open door into the room beyond. Neither daring to overstep the threshold. As strange as it might sound, from what we might resemble right now, there is no awkwardness between the eerie silence that envelops us, only mutual understanding. We know, from previous alliance that we both need to think things through before continuing.

The two of us knew, despite Jaspers claims, that as soon as the door closed behind us we might end up in a far more compromising situation. We knew from previous episodes. I knew Jasper's nature, as Jasper's knew mine. I knew his every gesture, his body language, the one that was at this very moment working up a heavy heat from within me; a heat that manifested its self in the form of a single droplet of sweat that was sliding down my spine as I ordered my feet to move. _Move, Bella, move._

"Bella…" Just when my feet had finally obeyed me and I had begun to set forth Jasper had spoken my name, like rich honey it fell off his lips. I gulped and turned my attention to him, only to see him intently gazing at me. "Maybe I should go, come back tomorrow?"

I frowned. "I –I thought you wanted to tell me everything?" I questioned, feeling slightly dejected.

"Bella, please, don't make such a face," Jasper pleaded. "I do, it's just–"

"Just _what_?" I demanded, the hurt I felt falling like poison off my tongue. "I have never thought of you as a man that doesn't keep his word, Jasper."

"It's not like that, Bella, and you know it," Jasper defended, his eyes smoldering a murkier shade of grey.

I sighed. My words had stung him the worse way. "Jasper, I don't even know what I know anymore…"

"You know me." With that, Jasper took my baggage from me and walked into the room, leaving me speechless on the doorstep. He was right, even though years had elapsed between us I still knew Jasper Hale. And somewhere, deep inside, I knew that despite his appearance and a few minor changes, the boy I once knew had never left him.

"Sorry," I whispered so lowly that I deranged myself into believing that Jasper must not have heard it, even though I was sure he had. He has always had a very keen ear.

"Are you coming in, or are you just going to stand there, Isabella?"

I chuckled, relieved, shaking my head. He had decided to dismiss it; that was so like him. Just like that, he had calmed all the turmoil and doubt that had erupted inside me, just minutes ago. He was still _my _Jasper, of that I could be certain. "I'm coming, don't be so hasty."

"Tsk, tsk, I see we still have some work to do on that attitude, Isabella," he teased, setting my baggage by the small desk next to my will be bed. The room was of a comfortable size, cozy, and the floor was of a handsome black and white tile. Instantly I knew that I could handle being in this room for two weeks, and another knot, of something I had not been aware that was preoccupying me, became undone. Slowly, I closed the door behind me and took in my surroundings little by little until I reached Jasper.

"What do you think?" Jasper inquired with a whisper, watching me intently as he cataloged my reaction. I smiled slyly, hiding the ruddiness of my cheeks behind the shadows of my curtains of hair. "Well?"

"I think it befits me perfectly." I simply answered, tracing a finger on the soft midnight covers that dressed my bed. They looked ever so inviting.

"Mhmm," he hummed in quiet agreement, his index finger traveling over the smooth mahogany surface of the small desk.

"Jasper?"

Jasper hummed distractedly in response. I stared at him for a moment, admiring him in all his enigmatic presence. That was always the one thing about Jasper that always fascinated me, the fact that even when he was trying to remain invisible, like now, he always managed to capture one's attention. And once he had it, it always seemed impossible for that party to look away.

"Did you not mention that you were also accommodated here?" I further inquired.

"Oh, yes, that I did," he confirmed, his attention on me once more. "On the floor bellow actually, room twelve."

"And yet, I still remain doubtful as to weather or not you are actually here… for all I know this could all be a figment of my imagination," I confessed, sinking into the midnight covers of my bed. I reached one conclusion as soon as I sat on it –I was going to sleep like a baby that was for sure.

"That makes two of us," Jasper admitted with a low rumbling chuckle. In two strides he was before me, kneeling down, between my legs, and still he somehow managed to hover over me. "But then, for me, I'd have to discard the idea that this is only a dream because this is even better than anything I have come up with. My imagination is too limited to create a moment like this." As he spoke, his left hand wrapped around my right and his right hand caressed away the tresses that obscured my face from his sight, casting them away behind my ear with each gentle stroke.

Utter bliss met each gesture as my lids fell heavily over my eyes, for a fraction of a moment.

"Jasper." My voice quivered as I sighed his name and fragmented frames of olden days fluttered behind my close lids. Sure, to everyone that knew me, I was still a virgin; even my mind sometimes forgot and managed to convince me otherwise. However, whenever Jasper was close enough to _touch _me, my body always remembered what my mind continuously managed to cast aside. My body remembered with fervor each pattern that Jasper's fingertips had drawn upon my skin the very first time he had ever worshiped my womanhood. Jasper had been the one I had trusted with the task of taking away the treasure I considered was my virginity and he, in turn, had entrusted me with his own virginity. It had been a wonderful night, filled with the most amazing of fireworks that had illuminated the dark skies with each climaxing explosion. We had loved each other in a twist of covers, in the dews of sweat, and in the sound of our husky voices, moaning with each stroke of the hand as the clock had ticked and our bodies had entwined. I had given him a ticket, to which my body was its stop, something I have never regretted. He had, after all, made it magical for the both of us.

However, the facts still remains that that night, and the few others that had presided thereafter, had been our secret alone. Not a single one of our friends knew about it, especially not Alice. We never knew why but it had been something we had agreed and concluded on, almost silently, Alice was to be protected from the knowledge of an _"us"_ for as long as we could wing it. It seemed as if her alone knew about it, she would break and so would our friendship.

"Bella, can I still take you up in your offer?" Jasper's breath fanned over my face, intoxicating me in his scent, momentarily disorienting me. My brow furrowed in confusion. "You said you'd listen to my story," he clarified and my eyes fluttered open, understanding. My breath hitched for only a second, Jasper was at a much closer proximity than I had expected. I could see every long, dark lash of his and every darker stroke of grey that dispersed across the irises of his eyes. Breathtaking.

My lips parted as if to speak and yet, no sound came out. Until, "Ye –yes, of course. You can tell me anything, Jasper, and I will surely listen, with wrapped attention."

"Thank you," Jasper sighed, relieved with gratitude, "Bella." I simply swallowed the lump at my throat, which I took to be my heart and nodded. I waited for him to continue but he remained silent, staring at me with an expression that I could not quite place with the many others he had showed me during the many years we had known each other. "I owe you an apology, Bella," he finally said, looking away from me, ashamed.

My frown creased, _where was the shame coming from? _"Jasper, please, look at me?" I pleaded, gently guiding his face towards me, in hopes that his sight would follow. "What is it, you know you can tell me, right?" Jasper's eyes stared at me, searching me, like the eyes of a frightened child would. He nodded.

"I didn't have time –I didn't know –they always parented everything was fine –Mom, she–" Jasper spoke fast, broken sentences that I almost failed to connect. Sobs shook his frame as he tried, for my sake to continue.

"Go on, Jasper, I'm here," I urged gently, caressing his face and placing a feathery kiss upon his brow. He closed his eyes and breathed in, collecting himself before continuing.

"Mother had had a spell that night and she fell, right before my very eyes. If I really think about it, I had seen the sings many times."

"Nadia," I whispered, fear making my voice quiver. I always suspected that Jasper must have had a good reason for leaving me, and all of our friends, behind, but this was just too much. Jasper nodded and a single tear made its appearance.

"So many times I had seen them, _we_ had seen them. Every time she would become ghostly pale, hold on to the counter with a lighthearted hand pressed to her forehead, trying to support her own weight and seem strong, and the bruises." All I could manage was a nod, I knew precisely the sings he had mentioned and as I thought back on it a tear escaped me. Dismissively, so that Jasper would not worry, I casted it away with a flourish of my fingertips. "At first I had thought the worse of my father–"

"You thought that he–" I interrupted, stopping abruptly. The audacity of my words, as I mulled them over, making the idea of it even more impossible, Jasper's father, Lian, loved his wife, Nadia, so dearly that it the mere idea was outrageous.

"Yes," he confessed with a sad smile, "that father was abusing mother. Of course, that was my way of ignoring the problem. I never truly thought of it as a true possibility. My father is too noble for such an act." I could not have said it better, Lian Hale was just too noble of a man, I had to agree. "So, that night, I did the only thing I could manage under the panic I was in, I called father. He rushed home, almost caused an accident in the process. I begged him for answers, any form of explanations but it all fell on deaf ears. He had been a wall of a man. When he had arrived he had looked so scared, so afraid to touch mother when he was about to pick her up and take her to bed. I had never seen him like that… and mom, she just caressed him when she became conscious again and realized that she was in his arms. Saying how silly and embarrassed she felt."

"Sounds like something Nadia would say."

"Yes," Jasper agreed, a painful smile adorning his lips. Wetting his lips before continuing Jasper looked at me, silently asking if it was okay to proceed. Simply, I nodded.

"Mother, as father later informed me, when we had moved, had developed early episodes of dementia, Alzheimer." As soon as the words had left Jasper's lips my own had uttered a strangled gasp, too aghast by the information I was trying hard not to accept.

"No…" I mouthed, shaking my head. Jaspers face was beginning to stain with tears, his eyes, as they stared at me, turned to voids that unsettled me. He nodded, closing his eyes as his body shook and more tears were shed.

"We ended up packing everything, avoiding everyone," as he said this, he looked at me apologetically, "and moving to Texas. There, my father had found a promising hospital that, at least, promised to slow down my mother's sickness quick process." Hope began to sink in as soon as I heard this, only to be completely shattered by what Jasper said next. "However, complications arose. Mother was pregnant and it was either, preserve her mind or the baby's life. Mom obviously wanted to preserve the baby so that left very little options, father did not have the strength to go up against her wishes, or to try and convince her otherwise as I had suggested many times." Jasper buried his face in his hands, for a moment. Before I preyed him away and brought him close, held him. "She really shouldn't have."

"That's just how Nadia is, Jasper. Nothing that you or your father could have said would have changed that. Your father new as much."

"I know, I know… But if only… her case worsen, she was only able to take very mild medicines that did nothing for her. The others, she couldn't take, they would have induced an abortion and mother had been set on preserving the live within her. Admiring as the gesture was, we all knew she was running out of –out of time…" For a moment I though that he would not continue so I simply brushed his tears away.

"Bella, she was four months pregnant when she –she began forgetting my face, father's face, and even forgetting the fact that she was pregnant." My eyes were like saucers now, shinning with brimming tears. "By the end of it, we had thought of every method we could possibly think of to remind her. Little notes, leaving pictures next to her so that when she woke she would see them, but non of them worked." I knew the ending already and I wished I did not have to hear it.

"Jasper." I squeezed his hand for support and he squeezed back, for a fleeting moment staring at or hands.

"Bella, we –we–" Jasper made a gesture as if he was about to vomit, but somehow managed to keep it at bay. His vulnerable state was making me panic, though I was glad that he trusted me enough to see him in such frenzied estate. "We couldn't save them…" At first I thought I had not heard him, due to how low a whisper his words had been. But as Jasper stared at me, waiting for a reaction, I knew I had.

"What do you mean?" I think my lips only moved and no sound came out.

"Mother had a seizure and by the time we had reached the hospital the baby had died. They said that the force of the seizure had rattled the baby's brain too much, resulting in its death, along… with mom's."

"Your father must have been devastated… you must have been a downright mess…"

"I still am, he still is," Jasper assured me with an eerie smile that unsettled me, however, I did not let it on.

"I'm… so sorry." There were no words to express the ache that my heart was feeling for the man kneeling before me, and the things he had gone through, by himself, since I had last seen him. I kissed each trembling, wet eyelid as I dried his tears away, along with a few of my own, and held him close as he held me. What a strange pair we made, were the weak supports the weak.

"It wasn't your fault, Bella," Jasper assured me.

"I should have been there," I protested, stubbornly.

"I have no doubt that you would have been there, had I given you the chance." Jasper's words were followed by a long pause that ensued an amiable silence that neither of us interrupted for a long while, as we stood in the dimness of my room, temple to temple. We merely stared at each other, exploring our faces, memorizing new laugh lines that had not been there the last time we had had a good look at each other, almost four years ago.

Through this thorough exploration I, once more, became aware of the scar running just across his high cheekbone to his well-defined, golden brow. Experimentally, I reached out for him and made to touch the scar. However, my movements had been too sudden and Jasper had flinched. The air hummed ominously and I was frightened that Jasper would just stand up and leave, as thus, I held my breath.

"Sorry," Jaspers said, apologizing sheepishly. Sorrow engulfed me.

"How did this happen?" I questioned, slowly tracing my finger from his golden brow to where it ended at the cheek, the action distracting Jasper enough to drop his defenses as he closed his eyes. Relishing in the warmth of my touch. He brought his own hand up, covering mine with his, letting our hands linger there for a while longer.

"War." His simple answer sent my heart into overdrive, not for the first time today.

"Oh."

"After mom died, I joined the army. I couldn't stand being in the house, it was too full of memories, and father was there, moping as much as I was, if not more. The emptiness that my mother left with her death was driving me insane…" As Jasper explained, I could not help but think that that was something that would have been inevitable, his joining the Army. Had Nadia been alive or not, he would have joined sometime or another, I was certain.

"Show me."

"What?" Jasper asked, puzzled.

"You have more scars, don't you?" I clarified. Understanding appeared in his eyes as he nodded.

"But I don't think you'd want to look at all of them, Bella," Jasper managed nervously.

"I want to see, I want to do something for you," I merely whispered, my heart thrashing once again. Jasper nodded, stood, and started to remove his black shirt over his head and I could not help but help him get out of it. As soon as my fingers made contact with the warm skin of his stomach, Goosebumps erupted all over his skin and his and my breath hitched. I stared in amazement at the chiseled body my eyes were assessing, branded with different strokes of trophies, his scars.

Just as I stare at them I knew that my first impression had been wrong, it was not pity what I was feeling towards Jasper and it was not sympathy, it was just compassion and understanding. Overtaken by the pain that I knew he must have experience with each scar I began to nurse each and every one of them with kissed. Starting with a crescent one just at the shoulder, another next to his bellybutton, and another, with each kiss my eyes never left his as I watched him close his eyes time and time again, in response each breath becoming shallower and shallower.

"Bella," Jasper called my name huskily, just as I was delivering my nursing upon his neck and my body was flushed against his. The thought that I might be having some kind of effect on him bringing a content smile upon my face that managed to make me crave for a little more. My breath became shallow and anticipation inundated my pores as I felt Jaspers hands at the small of back, bringing me closer to him.

"Jasper?" I breathed onto his neck. A low moan escaped his lips and I looked up at him. The smoldering look on his eyes, right then, set a fire coursing through my being and to my very core.

"I think, I should go?" His wording sounded incoherent and I almost chuckled, I _was _affecting him.

"Are you asking me?" I questioned, mockingly, drawing his face close so that our lips were a breath away from each other and his breathing stopped, as did mine in anticipation. He searched my eyes for a moment as his eyes traveled to my mouth and then back again to my face, when he suddenly connected his lips to mine, kissing me.

He kissed me hungrily and unhurriedly behind each heated kiss. Passion was behind each kiss as he lightly backed me up further into the midnight covers of the bed and hovered over me, panting we stared at each other. Came the silent question. The sudden heat that rose to my cheeks serving as answer as he gently stroked and admired my blush.

"How I've missed your blushing," he mused into the hollow my neck as he began to press kisses there, making me blush further. He trailed kisses over my clothed body until he reached the area where my shirt had ridden up. His fingers, followed by his lips, touched my hips, setting me on fire as I moaned, tangling my fingers in Jasper's hair.

"And I've missed you _in _me."

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_**A/N: **__Sorry, but this is where we must say goodbye, at least for this chapter! Let me know what you think with a NICE review._


	6. In the Hands of a Puppeteer

**A/N: **_It has taken me a long time coming, but here I am, delivering you your new chapter. Hope you guys can enjoy it just as much as you have enjoyed the previous chapters… Now, here things get a bit juicy, so for those of you who have been craving some steaming action, you are about to _get some_._

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**Sweet Revenge You've Lied Again**

– **Chapter6: **_In the Hands of a Puppeteer_

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_**Previously;**_

"_Show me."_

"_What?" Jasper asked, puzzled._

"_You have more scars, don't you?" I clarified. Understanding appeared in his eyes as he nodded._

"_But I don't think you'd want to look at all of them, Bella," Jasper managed nervously._

"_I want to see, I want to do something for you," I merely whispered, my heart thrashing once again. Jasper nodded, stood, and started to remove his black shirt over his head and I could not help but help him get out of it. As soon as my fingers made contact with the warm skin of his stomach, Goosebumps erupted all over his skin and his and my breath hitched. I stared in amazement at the chiseled body my eyes were assessing, branded with different strokes of trophies, his scars._

_Just as I stare at them I knew that my first impression had been wrong, it was not pity what I was feeling towards Jasper and it was not sympathy, it was just compassion and understanding. Overtaken by the pain that I knew he must have experience with each scar I began to nurse each and every one of them with kissed. Starting with a crescent one just at the shoulder, another next to his bellybutton, and another, with each kiss my eyes never left his as I watched him close his eyes time and time again, in response, each breath becoming shallower and shallower._

"_Bella," Jasper called my name huskily, just as I was delivering my nursing upon his neck and my body was flushed against his. The thought that I might be having some kind of effect on him bringing a content smile upon my face that managed to make me crave for a little more. My breath became shallow and anticipation inundated my pores as I felt Jaspers hands at the small of back, bringing me closer to him._

"_Jasper?" I breathed onto his neck. A low moan escaped his lips and I looked up at him. The smoldering look on his eyes, right then, set a fire coursing through my being and to my very core._

"_I think, I should go?" His wording sounded incoherent and I almost chuckled, I was affecting him._

"_Are you asking me?" I questioned, mockingly, drawing his face close so that our lips were a breath away from each other and his breathing stopped, as did mine in anticipation. He searched my eyes for a moment as his eyes traveled to my mouth and then back again to my face, when he suddenly connected his lips to mine, kissing me._

_He kissed me hungrily and unhurriedly, behind each heated kiss. Passion was behind each kiss as he lightly backed me up, further into the midnight covers of the bed and hovered over me, panting we stared at each other. Came the silent question. The sudden heat that rose to my cheeks serving as answer as he gently stroked and admired my blush._

"_How I've missed your blushing," he mused into the hollow of my neck as he began to press kisses there, making me blush further. He trailed kisses over my clothed body until he reached the area where my shirt had ridden up. His fingers, followed by his lips, touched my hips, setting me on fire as I moaned, tangling my fingers in Jasper's hair._

"_And I've missed you _in_ me."_

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As the bold words escaped my lips, I gasped, astounded by my own audacity. Jasper groaned in response, looking intently into my eyes he spoke huskily, "Bella… are you sure? We can stop right now, pretend nothing happened…"

Gently, I set two fingers to his lips, hushing him. "I am sure, Jasper. I want to do something for you, to comfort you, and this is the only way I could think of. I know, you could never hurt me." He kissed my fingers lightly and nodded.

"I'd never hurt you," Jasper echoed as if he were making a sworn promise.

My fingers tracing their way to the nape of his neck, caressing his blond tresses, crawling a pattern down the length of Jasper's back –stopping every so often to trace a new protuberant scar. Jasper looked at me keenly, as the hairs on the back of his neck stood on end in reaction to my retracing actions. Something in his smoldering eyes, a shadow that resembled more light than shadow –if that were _realistically_ possible– was making my senses hyperaware of his charisma.

"…Bella."

"I know."

I realized, staring into the gray depths of Jaspers eyes that I could drown in and never realize that I was drowning in a lack of breaths. Truly, the strangest sensation that rippled through my entire body, making me shiver with foretold expectancy. So how did it feel so _right_? It was as if within those gray depths, accentuated with the hues of summer blues, I had found my anchor. Jasper was the ground beneath my feet, what made surrealism a reality.

Next, I caressed his jaw, making my way to his full blood red lips and outlined them as he parted them for me. I wanted those lips to kiss me again. Instead, I brought him close, kissed his temple, the trembling lid that held traces of the scar that had held my attention the first time, and, finally, his lips. We both moaned, our lips parted, allowing for our breathless breaths to mingle in our exuberance of ecstasy.

The kiss was leisurely, our lips barely touching as they danced and whispered in their frantic attempted to interweave with each other with the airiness of a feather. The sweetest kiss that we had shared, thus far. And we had shared many; we had a history after all. On impulse, I grazed my teeth nimbly on Jaspers lower lip, pulling at it delicately, earning an approving moan from him. I smiled against his lips, deepening the kiss.

Ecstasy. Pleasure. Insatiable need, readying to be satisfied by our entangling. They all burned from Jasper's body and onto mine, gathering somewhere between the gorges of my core.

"…_Jasper…" _I panted between a moan as Jaspers tongue invaded the entrance of my mouth and his familiar, yet unfamiliar, taste exploded within my mouth and our tongues embraced. I hugged Jasper to me, needing to feel his _heat_ flushed against me, as my heart began to hammer a song against my chest that I only experienced when Jasper touched me.

That same intense beat was pounding in complementary rhyme from Jasper's chest, I discovered as I clawed my fingers down his chest. Jasper hissed in pleasure, even though I was almost positive I had drawn blood. My body was squirming under him with pleasure as his lips left my mouth for my neck and his hand worked on the obstruction that my shirt provided.

"Bella," Jasper worshiped, his tongue tasting the perspiration he was extracting from my body. I could not help the embarrassing moan that left my parting lips in response to his actions. Jasper smiled against my skin, my mind clear enough to detect the cheekiness of his action, but clouded enough by red lust that I could not form a coherent argument.

I was momentarily at Jasper's mercy, and that was fine by me.

My back arched as the warmth of his hands snacked behind my back, pressing me against him where the recently uncovered skin of my stomach made contact with his. The pleasures the small contact brought set a flare of flames coursing through my veins, making me glow euphoric. Jasper continued his un-patterned teasing between heated openmouthed kiss until, at last, I was free of my shirt.

"Beautiful," Jasper breathed, sounding like someone who had just gotten his breath taken away, looking at me as he pinned my hands to the bed. He knew me well enough to know that I would have tried to cover myself, otherwise. I blushed a deep crimson, under his inspection, but he simply kissed my blush and soothed my embarrassment away in the process. "Blue has always been your color. Specially such deep Indigo," he added approvingly, looking at the delicate bra with intricate designs that I was wearing, as his hands traveled the length of my torso.

I whimpered and squirmed under the slow trajectory of his hands, wanting so much more, I could feel myself dampening just from his gaze and touch.

"Jasper, _please_," I begged, my begging turning into a moan as Jaspers right hand shadowed my left breast and his hot breath hovered over my left. My eyes rolled back and my back arched once again. I could feel my hardening nipple rubbing almost painfully against the fabric of my bra, begging to be nursed. Jasper obliged, in his own manner.

His mouth still hovering over my breast, Jasper gently scraped his teeth upon my fabric covered breast and painfully slowly began to close his mouth until he was holding my erect nipple between his teeth, massaging my left breast so that it was not unattended. He moaned as I moaned, rubbing against him, feeling his own protuberance between my legs, where the yearning was the strongest.

My body was beginning to remember everything about Jasper's _touch_. Now I was trapped in a cage of pleasure were not only the present Jasper was making me his prisoner, but also the memories of ecstasy from the past had me in a tangled hold. The perspiration pearling my body was making me shiver as Jasper's breath ghosted over my body behind his every pant. I could feel my bra dampening where Jasper had been pinching nipple with his teeth, now deliberately sucking on it. Another moan escaped me, much louder and lustful than the last, which I tried to futilely stifle between my fingers. Jasper smiled, kissing the fingers covering my lips until finding my mouth underneath. He tasted of salty honey and spices, the mixture of my taste and his, I supposed.

"What is it that you want, Bella?" Jasper questioned, teasing as he traveled the length of my body, planting heated openmouthed wet kisses between each word, accentuating his sweet torture. "_Hmm_?" I could feel perspiration flooding between the valleys of my legs as I desperately gripped for Jasper, feeling every part of his warm, chiseled planes. My reward, a heart racing moan that broke a peace of damp.

"I… I –I _need_…" I felt like a stuttering fool, the kind of fool that only Jasper could turn me into, the one that could not even finish a sentence. I gulped, finding what I was looking for, the hook of Jasper's jeans. My fingers brushing lazily over the tent forming there, Jasper hissed, pressing himself against my palm.

"_Yes…_?" he panted raggedly. I smiled coyly from under the curtains of my disheveled damp hair. Jasper was breathing hard, attune with my own erratic breathing. Noticing the perspiration gathering in the hallow of Jasper's neck I began to unbutton his pants as I stuck my tongue out, licking my path up to that very hallow from the very center of his chest. Jasper's eyes closed, lolling his head back in pleasure, allowing me easier access to his neck.

"…You," I finished as my fingers bordered the hem of his trunks, deciding, I slid my fingers under the elastic and, with Jasper's help, managed to remove them. I moaned, anticipation rattling my body as I stared at Jasper's new exposure, holding out in attention for me –dripping, just as I was dampening. I licked my lips. I moved to sit and Jasper matched my movements in reverse so that he, too, was now sitting.

"Bella…" Jasper sighed with a shaky shudder, my hand wrapping around him tentatively. I could not help but be fascinated. Had it not been for the fact that we had done this on the past, I probably would have thought it impossible for my body to welcome Jasper's intrusion. But I knew it would, it already had done so in the past. Secretion soiled my hand as I drew back the skin on Jasper's member with my left palm, my right teasing the reddening exposure. Jasper shuddered with the small release, his right hand guiding my left now as I licked my fingers and he observed. His shaft vibrated at the sight. He tasted wonderfully, like pomegranate.

"Help me out of these," I offered, motioning to my pants. I giggled as he more than willingly obliged, dashing into action and peeling my pants off my body. Now he held his breath, sitting on the bed and facing me as I stood before him in my underwear, the contrast of the dark fabric and my pale skin giving me an ethereal beauty. According to Jasper.

"My _God_…" Jasper whispered in a rush of air as we undid the delicate ribbons that held my panties in place and they fell unceremoniously to the floor, exposing my lower half. Jasper stared at me, breathing fast, as I set my knees on either side of him, straddling him.

"_Jasper_," I whimpered as the vibrations of Jasper's penis brushed against the mouth of my cave with a ghostly tease, making me weak. Supporting, Jasper placed a warm hand to my lower back, while the other undid the clasp of my bra without difficulty, exposing my breasts to the cool air.

"Beautiful…" Jasper admired, tenderly brushing his fingers against my exposed breasts. Instantly, they became even more erect than before and Jasper wrapped his tongue around one of them. I gasped, creating friction as I pressed myself against his component. A current of longing and pleasure flared through my body, gathering where our bodies were about to be joined. "I can't believe I can finally be with you like this…" the amazement in his voice filled me with overflowing awe, he too had been wanting this as much as I had been desiring it over our years apart.

"I can't believe it either, therefore, you need to make up for lost time."

I could not help it as I grabbed his handsome face between my hands and covered it with gossamer kisses all over, leaving his lips for last and pressing myself fully against him. It felt as if we were somehow merging into one, melting onto one another with inexplicable bliss. Jasper hummed against my lips in pleasure, the special song that was only for my ears.

"How?" he whispered against our entangled lips, cradling my face in his hands as his fingers tangled in my hair. I sighed and his tongue tasted the cavernous space of my stored honey, our tongues dancing around each other before embracing. There was no fight for dominance, and there need not be, we equally had craved the other.

"By touching me, caressing me, teasing me, squeezing me, and loving me tonight for every night you didn't within the last four years," came my ragged reply.

"Sounds like a fare trade." Jasper put a finger right to the middle of my back and caressing me, causing my body to arch. Just what he wanted, I could tell.

"You think?"

More and more, each time Jasper would touch me I could feel myself resembling a puppet whose strings were being pulled every which way by their puppeteer, in my case, Jasper. His hands working his magic over my body, pulling at invisible strings I never knew existed but he had somehow discovered and extracting sweet ecstasy through our blissfulness. The nectar of his success was my moans and whimpers as I writhed under his touch, wanting more and getting more.

Craving each other's touch we succumbed to our desires. We loved each other, making up for the past four years of our absence of touch.

**_

* * *

Three Days Later:_**

I inserted my card-key into the panel and opened the door, and walked into my hotel room, dripping wet and angry. Satisfied, I heard the door close noisily behind me; I stepped further into the dimmed lighted room. I needed to rid myself of my wet cloths and quickly, I was beginning to tremble with cold. Managing to get my hands through the spaghetti straps of my summer dress, I let it pool heavily at my feet as it slid off my wet body. I stopped trying to undo the clasp of my bra when I heard and _felt_ a presence behind me, _observing_ me.

With a sly smile I looked behind me, and sure enough, he had followed me in and he was looking at me, a small shudder running through his wet body. Appraising awe written all over his lustful features, taking me in. Our eyes made contact and I grew insanely audacious, devious even. I wanted him to watch me; I wanted to give him a show, to seduce him. I began to undress, watching as his eyes widened. I could tell he wanted to be a gentleman and look away but unable to do so, he just gaped.

I was instantly grateful to Alice, who had forced me to buy new underwear before coming on my trip –_thank you Alice_, I whispered into the silence of my mind. I was wearing charcoal polyester boy-shorts, embroidered with delicate, spiraling, designs of peacock blue and its matching bra –a contrast that even _I _knew looked great against my pale skin, all an indistinct handsome hue that could be distinguished through the thin white material.

Casting aside my wet, now, see-through white dress, I bent down to undo the satin-like material of the lace that held my sandals in place at my calves –meticulously keeping my hefty ram in the air and in his direction –growing immensely bold, to my surprise.

Slowly, painfully so, I undid the lace and it caressed my skin like flowing water as it slipped down my legs, one at a time –texture like silk, just without the shininess of silk. I heard the scuttle of a shuddering breath escape him as he watched, clenching his fists at his sides as if he were trying to control himself. I looked at him from under my lashes as I straightened myself, ever so lithely, and made eye contact with him. Instantly, he let out a huff of ruffled air escape his parted lips, taking a step closer to me. His breathing stopped altogether and my heart did a summersault and sped off into overtime.

Though I wanted him closer, his hands all over my body, I shook my head as he went to take his second step closer to me –to my surprise, he obeyed and licked his succulent lips for me, as I bit mine, still holding his breath. Carefully, I stepped out of my equally white sandals and closed the distance between the two of us.

His delectable scented breath, in the form of a gasp, caressed my heated pale, wet skin. Blatantly, my hand rose, almost of its own accord, and started to undo the buttons of his wet and, now too, see-through powder blue button-down, long-sleeved shirt as he shivered under my touch, watching me and encouraging me. Rigorously, I finished the very last of his buttons, making sure to explore the contours of his warm, sculpted chiseled chest of his canvas-like body, and painting it with shudders as I went. I slipped the soft cotton off his shoulders and back, and onto the carpeted floor.

I licked my lips, lustfully. I loved how he reacted to my tender touch.

Shivering with silent groans as his abs constricted under the tender caresses of feather-light fingertips, my fingertips, I loved how he kept on watching me, and I loved how his fingers had risen to caress the flush of my heated cheeks –murmuring how beautiful he found it. My fingers traveled all the way down to his navel were I simply traced in fascination the outline of his delicate, yet masculine, dip and then, making sure to watch his every facial reaction, made my way back up.

The sensation of feathered fingers over his body seemed to make him vulnerable as his head drew back, eyes rolling to the back of his head, I realized.

What a beautiful sight.

My fingertips were now exploring the warm column of his neck, my thumb dipping into the wet hollow, feeling and seeing the vibrations of his moans, tracing his Adam's apple, and finally, touching his shaved-smooth face. He had probably never looked more beautiful than how he looked now; I was almost certain, under _my _mercy. A small-satisfied smile curved the corners of my lips as I tangled my fingers in his copper-feathered hair and tugged, pulling his face toward me.

Seeing and understanding my intentions the man before me obediently obliged. Drawing closer with every breath and every whisper of air –inhaling all that is I and I all that is he. Our lips were, now, almost touching –the tension of the proximity making the air around us static, urging us into combustion. Our breathing, quickening in rhyme to our drumming heartbeats and the heat radiating from our calcining bodies becoming almost palpable, to the point of taste.

I wanted him. And I was sure he wanted me, if not for the hunger in his evergreen eyes.

* * *

**A/N: **

_Well, that's another chapter... the first time I've ever tried anything like this, mature. –Anyway, leave a comment –or your disapproval by submitting a review! I really would like to know if I did a good or bad job with it, no joke! _

_Thanks for reading, and don't feel too bad if you do not understand the second half of it, it shall be explained shortly. _


	7. Evergreen

**A/N:**_I __apologize __that __it __has __taken __me __two __years __to __get __back __to __this __story, __I__'__m __appalled __at __myself. __Now, __I__'__ve __been __updating __mostly __all __of __my __stories __like __a __mad __woman, __including __this __one. __Hope __you __enjoy __this __chapter._

* * *

_**Previously;**_

_Our breathing, quickening in rhyme to our drumming heartbeats, and the heat radiating from our calcining bodies becoming almost palpable, to the point of taste._

_I wanted him. And I was sure he wanted me, if not for the hunger in his evergreen eyes. _

* * *

**Sweet Revenge You've Lied Again**

**Chapter7:**_Evergreen_

I sighed, standing solemnly apart from the rest and trying not think why I was here. Instead, I threw my head back as the wind blew my way and into the line of thickening trees before and let my silent tears fall.

Death.

Pain.

Guilt.

Loss.

Abandoned.

Despair.

Lost.

_Gone._

_Gone..._

God, he was _gone_. A sob racked through my body and I clenched my trembling hands into fists at my side, trying to stop the uncontrollable trembling. In an attempt not to run into the line of trees and give in to my rage or the want, the _need_to punch something, anything, more tears fell.

_Control_. I was always good at control but it had deserted me now, I needed to regain it again, find its evaporating threads before I reached the point of no return. _Agony_. Swallowing my grief, I concentrated on my breathing to slow it down to a more normal tempo and tried to find something else to concentrate on.

With a strangled, silent cry caught in my tear-burning throat and my parting lips, I thought of Italy. I should have been here for him, taking care of him. Instead, I had spent a year in Italy, doing an internship in archeology that I hadn't even planned on accepting in the first place. I didn't regretted it, but I regretted not being here. I sighed, fisting my hair and crouching on the balls of my feet, I rested my elbows on my knees and buried my face in my hands.

Now, it had been a week since my return and I was plagued by this all-consuming guilt, but the memories I created there will always remain with me, but so would the guilt and the feel of her ivory skin under my fingertips, my fingers running through her mahogany hair, and the smile on her eyes, her supple, plumb red lips that tasted like pomegranate against my tongue…

* * *

_**oOo**_

_**Rome, Italy:**_

_A Week and Three Days Earlier_

_**oOo**_

* * *

My agile fingers were gliding over the ivory and ebony rectangular keys of the grand piano as I closed my eyes, listened and enjoyed the music my nimble fingers were creating. There was no elaborate preamble, there was just the piano, the music, and I, when I sat on the bench and broadcasted my enjoyment around the room.

However, ever since three days ago, every time I closed my eyes flashes of ivory skin, chocolate eyes, and mahogany, glossy, long, cascading hair would invade my alone time between the piano, the music, and I. Frustrated, I couldn't stop thinking about _her_, I allowed the invasion to continue. I couldn't bring myself to try and evaporate the memory of _her_, I didn't have the strength to fight it anymore.

To fight the growing, intensifying desire to see her again and myself was torture. I just couldn't keep it up any longer, because every time that desire would double and come back with a vengeance. It had been nearly half a year since the last time I had woken up to a painful case of morning wood, and now, ever since I'd bumped into _her_it had happened, three mornings in a _cazzo _row.

It was beyond painful, but I would take matters into my own hand and release to thoughts of her ivory skin, red lips, tangled mahogany hair, and chocolate eyes rapt under my unyielding body and gazing at me. Just thinking about it almost made my lissome fingers miss a note, but before I could commit such blunder, I recuperated and focused my attention on the music.

I smiled at the harmonizing sounds that my fingers evoked and my thoughts began to wonder again, making me frown in annoyance. I could just imagine my fingers gliding over another set of ivory and making _her_sing, my finger silently telling her and letting her know how _bella _she looked under their ministrations.

Without realizing it, the conduit of my thoughts had lead me to change the sound of my music and as subtly as possible, just when I had been about to reach the previous song's crescendo, _her_ melody began flowing through my fingers and out of the grand piano. _Lo __Straniero __Bella,_I had titled, _The __Beautiful __Stranger_.

I had created this melodious, entrancing composition unconsciously the moment my evergreen eyes had landed on hers. Evergreen on brown, the leaves to the tree stem. It had been disturbing and enlivening. In that moment, I had understood the genius behind Beethoven's ability to create music and turn it into sound out of seemingly thin air. I had been floored.

Immerging myself in the music, my composition, I was mesmerized by the ricochet of notes inundating the small space of the café, and I came to the conclusion that the sound I had imagined in my mind paid the actual melody no justice. Flowing like water, my fingers move over the keys and seeking, pressed the right ivory with flawless precision, followed by the accompanying ebony that complimented to its well-rounded, meticulous perfection. _This_ is bliss.

"_Cosa __pensi __che __stai__f acendo, __giovanotto?; _What do you think you are doing, young man?" a gruff, angry voice interrupted, making me lose concentration. I scowled as I pressed the wrong key. "_Paghiamo __di __riprodurre __ciò __che __è __di__fronte __a __te, __non __quello __che __vi __piace __giocare. _Uscire_.; _We pay you to play what's in front of you, not what you feel like playing. _Get __out_."

"_Io __non __vedo __nessuno __lamentarsi,_; I don't see anyone complaining," I retorted, growing angry, "_sembrano __divertirsi, __piuttosto._; they seem to be enjoying themselves, rather."

"_Vattene ragazzo,_; Get out kid," he growled, "_prima che ti fanno uscire!_; before I make you get out!"

And then, my boss made the mistake of touching me, placing a hand over my shoulder and fisting my shirt as he tried to fling me off the bench.

"_Farò __uscire __quando __voglio __uscire!_; I'll get out when I want to get out!" I screamed at him, nose flaring. "_Ora, __mettere __le __mani __sporche __di __dosso!_; Now, get your filthy hands off me!"

"_Ora, __ragazzo, __calmati,_; Now, boy, calm down," he hissed, "_non __si __vuole __causare __una __scena_.; you don't want to cause a scene." Only, that was exactly what I wanted to do, I realized. There was a tense buzz in the air as every customer in the small café sat tersely and watched our every move. "_Ho chiesto gentilmente, non mi fanno chiedere di lasciare la terza volta.;_I've asked you politely, don't make me ask you to leave a third time."

"_Educatamente?_; Politely?" I scoffed in disbelieve, practically spitting on the man. The crowd held their breath, my arm coiled, my fist clenched tight, the coil sprang forth, and next thing I knew, I punched my boss in the face. The room as a whole gasped and then it was deathly quite.

Everyone watched with bated breath, rapt by the scene unfolding before their eyes and the different hues of puce my boss' astounded face went through before he reciprocated.

"_Tu __stronzo __piccola __madre_…; You little mother fucker…" his voice came out a dangerous, quiet rage and I prepared myself. "_Ti insegnerò una lezione su come cazzo correttamente, ragazzo._; I'll teach you a lesson on how to properly fuck, boy." _I __guess __this __means __I__'__m __fired,_ I thought fleetingly, darkly. With those final and happy words, he launched, fist high, and aiming for my face, or so I thought.

Without knowing exactly how it happened, I found myself pinned to the glass wall adorning the front of the café that looked onto the busy street with on of my arms twisted painfully behind my arm and the other plastered on the glass, along with my face.

"_Si dovrebbe avere ascoltato me in precedenza.;_You should have listened to me earlier," the boss hissed in my ear and I hissed in pain as he added more pressure, twisting my arm further. _So __hospitable, __Italians,_ I thought, with a grimace and chuckled. My breath caught as another wave of pain shoot through me when I tried to struggled and then–

I was staring into familiar, unfamiliar brown chocolate eyes. Unfamiliar, because even though I knew I was staring into eyes expressing surprise, shock, and recognition, this was the first time I had seen so many flowing emotions there, in their depths. It was _her_, my inspiration for _Lo __Straniero __Bella._

Realizing I wasn't breathing, I took in a shuddering breath and smirked at my mystery girl. She looked at me and at the men holding me uncertainly with a raised brow, a slight rose blush making her skin glow like the twilight sky.

"_Sarò __lì, __dammi __un __minuto;_ I'll be right there, give me a minute," I told her urgently through the glass and hoped she would listen. I was desperate. I saw her frown and mouth the words '_Non __capisco_; I don't understand,' as she turned and started to walk away. Surprised, for a moment I didn't do anything but watch her hips sway as her retreating form kept getting further and further away.

I was moving on instinct now, the thought that I needed to catch up to her serving as catalyst. Quicker than I had ever moved before, I twisted from the hold my captors had me under and managed to get away. The onlookers cheered, enjoying the show, and I couldn't help the smirk that stretched my lips.

Winking at my ex-boss, I ran for it and slipped out of the café the next second, his angry words falling behind me. On a whim, I made it my decision to follow in the direction she had gone, hoping to find her on the way. I rounded a corner into the _Piazza __di __Spagna_, just when I was growing slightly impatient, and finally caught sight of her from across the square's fountain. Slowing my pace to a long and somewhat respectable stride, I attempted to catch my breath with each measured step that took me to her.

Meanwhile, I took my time to take her in, she was sited on the _Scalinata __della __Trinità __dei __Monti _(or _Spanish__Steps_) that lead to the church, _Trinità __dei __Monti_, at the top of the hill while eating a pizza. Looking radiant under the hues of the receding rays of the sun, dressed in a white-spaghetti strap dress that hit just bellow the knees and with her hair draped over her left shoulder, billowing teasingly with the meager breeze, as if tempting me to reach out and put it back behind her ear. She ate with so much gusto, that I was beginning to recent that piece of pizza.

_Lucky __inanimate __objet_, I scowled_. __Great,__now __I__'__m __scowling __at __food __too.__ '__Cause __my __own __dick __wasn__'__t __enough, __the __traitor... _It was stirring again at the sight of her and the uncooperative cheese that went on forever, while she stretched it between her teeth, lips, and the slice of pizza. Her tongue slipped out as she finally gave up on stretching the cheese, took matters into her own hands, and now licked her own tasty-looking fingers.

I moaned, silently, what a sight. This probably wasn't a good idea, given the effect she had on me and I wasn't anywhere near her, but I needed to talk to her. _Would_ I be able to talk to her, normally? I had to risk it, I concluded, or forever wonder down the maddening roads of 'what ifs?'.

"_Ehi_,; Hey," I greeted, once I was towering over her and casting her in my shadow. She looked up at me, pizza halfway to her mouth, stared in surprise, and blinked, remaining silent, while her tongue slipped out again to wet her succulent lips. Okay, I amended, I deserve that.

After how I had acted last time I'd seen her, she was actually being more cordial than I could have ever hoped for. I had been an ass. A confused one, but an ass nonetheless. She looked at me expectantly, if a little bemused.

I cleared my throat and started to explain, "_Ti ho visto in precedenza e riconosciuti è da prima... Non ho intenzione di seguirti, ma volevo chiedere scusa..._"

I was squirming and shuffling on my own two feet as my words trailed of, feeling like a fumbling idiot, while she just kept on chewing her lucky piece of pizza carefully and scrutinized me between every bite and blink. She sighed, taking her last bite, stood, and dusted off imaginary crumbles. She was a clean eater, I noted and stored.

She sighed, looked at me, and began giggling. The sound of her joyous laughter made me want to smile too, but the only thing I managed was a tentative smile, feeling bashful and a little insecure.

"_Scuse_,; Sorry," she blurted out and the sound of her voice was music to my ears.

"_No,__va__bene,;_No, it's okay," I told her. I frowned at her as my words sent her into another bout of giggles and I wondered if my voice sounded off for some reason. My nerves were beginning to do funny things to me, my palms were sweaty and my heart was beating so fast. Like it was had a mind of its own, trying to pound open my chest, expose itself, and let her do whatever she wanted with it once she had it in her hands.

_My __heart __wanted, _needed _to __be __owned __by __her, __by __this _Straniero Bella_._ I gulped, trying to swallow that sudden, intrusive thought, along with my saliva, but my mouth was dry and I merely ended up swallowing air.

"Okay! I confess!" she cried, smiling. "I can't understand a word you are saying… you speak too fast! Though I think I caught a few words here and there, but I can't be sure…"

"Oh." Slowly, understanding washed over me, while she watched me closely, as if she was wondering or worrying that she might have offended me and I felt great relief. _Hmm__… __I__'__m __slow __at __processing __around __her, __duly __noted __for __later __consideration._

"Your accent is amazing?" she offered, biting her lip bashfully and my lip twitched, trying to hold back my laughter. I burst out laughing and she joined me in. Really, it wasn't that funny, but for some reason, she was.

"Okay, so it was a problem of my words being lost in translation?" I chuckled.

She gaped at me for a moment, before answering, "Y-yes." It is, hands down, the cutest of stutters I have ever had the pleasure of hearing. (Silent groan.) I smiled. _Do __that __again_. "You speak English very well," she observed. "A man of many talents…"

_Was __it __just __me __or __was __that __some __kind __of __innuendo? _I shook my head to get it out of the gutter. "Not really, just, English is my first language." She grumbled something under her breath that sounded suspiciously like 'modest too', but I let it slide, given that I was nervous enough as it was.

"Got it." She accepted. "So… What were you trying to tell me earlier? Sorry I ended up laughing and you sounded so serious…"

"Oh, that, it's okay," I scratched my neck. Here goes nothing… "I was just saying that I saw you earlier, by the window, you know," –she nodded– "and recognized you from before on the train... I didn't mean to follow you, but I wanted to apologize…"

"Apology accepted. You looked like you were on a hurry, understandable. No harm done, thanks to you." I nodded, agreeing to the fact that I _had_ been on a hurry that day. Though, she was throwing me on a loop on that last statement and I wasn't about to ask, not y and I wasn't about to ask, not yet any _yet_ anyway.

"Thanks," I said, feeling uncharacteristically bashful. "So… what brings a young woman, all by her lonesome self, to Rome, Italy?" I asked, wanting to hear her talk again, but she stiffened the next moment the words were out of my mouth. That hadn't been the reaction I 'd been expecting. Okay, time to lighten the mood. "Don't tell me… I'll take a guess. From what I've gathered, upon observation of the opposite sex and talking to a few, the vast majority of the women that travel alone, to Rome of all places, are usually after two things–"

"And what exactly would those two things be?" she asked me tersely, trying to placate me with a smile that came out a little too forced. Though I see that now, I hadn't in the moment.

"To get away from the disaster their recent breakup turned into, probably illicit, and," I paused for dramatic effect, "great sex. Wait, make that three, now that I think about it. Or thirdly, both." I smiled sideways at her. "And I'll say, given my expert eye, you are one of the latter and stumbled upon the great sex equation already! No worries, I won't ask for the details. Which leads me to ask, what kind of naughty and illicit relationship are _you_ running away from? Who was the bastard that broke your heart?"

For some reason my own words annoyed me and I didn't want to look at her when I knew my face was a mask of anger and... _jealousy? __God, __what __had __I __been __babbling __about?_ She's just going to think that I'm some dick that goes around chasing after lonely women and then go gossiping to whomever crosses my path about their heartbreaking stories. _I __sound __more __like __an __asshole __now_…

She stood up abruptly, shocking me, and when I went to follow, she rounded on me and slapped me. "You don't know the first thing about me, asshole!" she screamed at me and my eyes widened in shock, while I nursed my tingling cheek. _Did __I __mention __I __thought __she __was __a __docile __little __thing?_ "And I was having a change of heart. As if! An Asshole on first impression, will always be an asshole in end." She smirked at me and my heart skipped a beat or two, and I think I fell in love, right then and there, and somehow I had ruined it with my big mouth. All I could do was stare, in awe of her. "We are done here, Asshole!"

Her touch had bee like a bolt of lightning coursing through my body and just that slap had me wanting for more. _I__'__m__a__masochist_, I realized as my lower anatomy reacted and I tried to come to terms with this new bit of information about myself while fixing myself. _Later_, I told myself, _she__'__s __getting __away __and __I __can__'__t __have __that_.

Looking around me, I realized we had been the only ones in the artificially lighted street of the Plaza. "Wait!" I called after her. She was further than I had expected by now, a whole two and a half buildings away. "It's dangerous to walk alone at night in these parts." My heart raced with worry as I saw her flip me the birdie, round a corner and disappear into an obscured alley. "Shit," I cursed under my breath and ran after her.

* * *

_**oOo**_

* * *

"Look, I'm sorry, ignore what I said just now and let's start over," I began to say as I rounded the corner. "You are right, my bad, I don't know you–" I stopped talking abruptly and took in the scene unfolding before me. There were three guys and they were all advancing on my mystery girl, who just stood there, looking like she was trying to figure some thing out.

Without thinking, I revealed myself and only now noticed the knife on the middle guy's hand, still, I continued to walk toward her calmly. My heart hammered, and as the thieves became aware of me, so did my mystery girl. She turned her back on them and looked immensely relieved to see me.

This was a stupid move and she realized a moment after I did, but so did the smirking thieves. Trusting she would understand, I shook my head and reached out to offer her my hand to take, wanting more than anything to close the two feet distance between us as quickly as possible and keep her safe, I hasten my pace slightly.

The thieves began to speak, more like taunt, really, taking turns as if finishing each other's sentences, _the __best __of __fucking __friends_. First the guy in the middle, then the one to his left, and lastly the one to his right, and the cycle would commence again. It was _fucking_ sick.

"_Guardate __cosa __abbiamo __qui..._; Look what we have here..."

"_Qualcuno che cerca di essere coraggiosi e salvare una damigella in pericolo, è quello che sembra._; Someone trying to be brave and rescue a damsel in distress, it's what it looks like."

"_Si pensa di poter portarci su, ragazzo pelle e ossa? Altrimenti, fare una passeggiata, abbiamo affare qui che non ti riguardano._; You think you can take us on, scrawny boy? Otherwise, take a hike, we have business here that don't concern you."

"_A __meno __che, __si __ha __qualche __soldo __da __offrirci?_; Unless, you have some money to offer us?"

"_Come __generoso!_; How generous!"

Ignoring their taunt, I kept my eyes on my mystery girl, who was momentarily pushing aside her anger at me, and trusting me with her life. I was grateful, and a little smug, that she was, for the moment, trusting me.

"_Ho cercato dappertutto per voi e anche chiamato la polizia, dal momento che non ho potuto trovare._; I've been looking everywhere for you and even called the cops, since I couldn't find you." I told her deliberately, somehow knowing that she would guess what I was talking about.

"_Mi dispiace, ho perso di vista di voi e si è perso nel processo._; Sorry, I lost sight of you and got lost in the process." I was happily surprised when she replied without hesitation and couldn't help the smirk that plagued me, when I saw them hesitate. That was enough.

"_Corri!_; Run!" I whispered to her. Taking advantage of the hesitation, I grasped her hand tightly in mine and it sent a delicious shock up my arm and through my system, making me gasp. I ignored it, turned, and we ran without a backwards glance and without stopping. I'd never been more scared for another person's life than I was for hers in that moment.

Panting and heaving, we stopped to catch our breath with the sound of the fountain serving as a calming soundtrack in the background. I looked around distractedly, anywhere but at her, and realized we had run back to the _Piazza __di __Spagna_. This place was easily starting to become one of my favorite spots in Italy…

"Let go of my hand," she panted hoarsely, interrupting my musing. It was a welcomed intrusion though. I chanced a glance at her. She looked stunning, hair a mess, cheeks flushed, and heaving breasts –I mean, _chest_.

"What?" I asked her, panting heavily, not understanding.

"Let go," she repeated.

I frowned and squinted at her. I still didn't understand, but my breathing wasn't anywhere near under control for me to attempt speak again any time soon. Instead, I shook my head and hoped you would get the meaning.

"I sad, let go of my hand!" she screamed at me, trying to wrench her hand out of my unyielding hold.

"Oh…"

It all happened in slow motion, like they always make you believe in movies that a catastrophe happens, in slow motion, and I'm not happy, okay, maybe a little, to reaffirm that theory to be true.

The moment I let go of her, she tried had tried wrenching it out of my grasp again with all her might, which caused her to backtrack into the fountain behind her with a yelp. I knew what would happen next as her knees hit the curving of the fountain's edge, causing them to bend on impact, which lead to her body losing the little balance it had in the first place, and she began to fall, I reached out.

"Wait, you're going to–" _Too __late_, I thought as I heard her squeal.

Only too late, now, I realized that her hand had reached out for mine and now she was taking me down with her. We fell with a _splash_, staring into each other's surprised, wide eyes, and came out sputtering, choking on water, while we tried to help each other up.

"A-are you okay?" I asked her, stuttering from the cold in my sodden state. I ran a hand through my wet hair in an attempt to get it off my eyes and enabling myself to have a proper look at her. My eyes widened as I took in her appearance, I could see _everything_. Her white dress was now transparent.

"Ahem," she cleared her throat, making my eyes fly to her face as I flushed with embarrassment at having been caught ogling. Evergreen eyes met smoldering dark brown chocolate eyes that were glaring. "Who the hell do you think you are?" she accused, pointing a finger at me and poking my chest for good measure.

I staggered back from the force, which had me reaching out for something to hold onto and since she was the closest one… I brought her down with me this time, a yelp of surprise escaping us both.

"Sorry," I immediately apologized. "Of course, if you hadn't push–"

"What?" she hollered, trembling with fury. I wanted to be a gentleman and tell her to stop doing that but my semi was starting to sprung into full attention. However, before she could take note of it, she was off me. Lucky for her and sadly for me. "If I hadn't pushed you, we wouldn't be here?"

"Well, no but–" I tried to argue, but I was rather distracted… I don't think she realizes she's, well, her dress, is see through.

"No," she was on a roll. "If you hadn't been speaking to me in the first place, _I_wouldn't be in this mess with _you_." She was breathing hard and I liked what it was doing to her breast and nipples, just not my cock. "This is all your fault!" she declared, glaring down at me as she towered over me. That did it, I snapped and stood up so fast she flinched. I smirked.

"Sure, I was an asshole to you," I admitted. She glared and I glared right back. "But who was the one that went into the dark, scary alley all alone after she had been warned?" I questioned and her eyes flickered away from me for a moment before coming right back with a deathly glare. "Huh? It was you, missy!"

"So what?" she retorted, "You think we are even?" Her brow was arched and it irked me and turned me on, all in one.

"Hell no, I just saved your brokenhearted life!" I screamed.

She gasped, looking hurt and very, very angry.

"For the last time," she enunciated slowly, "_You! __Don__'__t! __Know! __The! __First! __Thing! __About! __Me! Asshole!_"

I flinched and my cock waved '_Hello_'.

"Stop with your damned, ridiculous assumptions!"

She slapped me then, and my cock was a soldier at full '_Attention!_'.

"We can fix that," I said huskily, "just let me take responsibility fir the state of your clothes first." She noticed it then and gasped, blushing like a bride and I couldn't keep my hands to myself any longer. Firmly, my hands fell to her waist and I brought her flushed against me.

"W-what do you t-think you're d-doing," she stuttered out, teeth chattering, her entire skin erupting with the cold, and her nipples deliciously hard against my panting chest.

"Taking responsibility," I told her as my hands traveled the length of her outer thighs, until I reached the back of her knees, lifted her up, and she now straddled my hip.

She gasped.

I moaned at the friction her gasp and her trembling, fidgeting body created as it brushed my erection. I was so close to being home like this, my dick knew, I knew it, and so did my heart. My lips descended on her open mouth, tasting water, warmth, pomegranate, and a hint of honey, enough to make me beg for it, but not enough to make me sick. I usually didn't favor honey.

At first, she didn't response and I'd worried I'd gone to far. Then, when I was about to eradicate myself from her delicious lips and release so that I could apologize, she took painful fistfuls' of my hair and drew me in, kissing me back. I moaned at the feel of her tongue upon my lips and opened up, giving her all the access she needed to gorge on my taste.

She took my offer almost instantly, diving in, she moaned and I with her, because with every stroke of her tongue over mine, she imitated the movement with her hips –creating a magical friction. My head lolled back, it was too much, and my knees felt wobbly from the sensory overload, but she continued to ground on my erection, kiss, bite, and lap at the droplets of water on my neck. It was a sensation like no other, like she had somehow managed to find her way under my skin and lighted up a fire from within and then, it stopped–

She was out of my arms, muttering to herself.

"Huh?" I was confused, dizzy, and had the biggest, dopiest smile on my face, I was sure.

"Shit," I heard her murmur, before I felt her slap me.

"What?" I protested and my eyes instantly opened to the sight of her angry, indignant, beautiful face. I blinked and she was gone, my head swiveled around until I found her again. Water was sloshing everywhere as she moved, trying to get away from me and out of the fountain. "Hey," I called lamely. She froze and the unfroze, getting out without paying me any mind.

I talked my frozen body and overheated brain into motion. She was running away from me, I couldn't have that. I _needed _to have her, we needed to finish what we had started. It was too explosive to not explore. I followed, like a mad man in the desert searching after mirages he swore he saw with the promise of finding water. Because the body needed water to sustain, and I needed this beautiful stranger to sustain from now on.

"Stay away from me!" she screamed at me. Only, my heart and my body were telling me that what she really meant was 'follow me and prove to me that what just happened was real'. I've been raised a gentleman so I will more than likely do as I'm asked, obliged. "Don't follow me! Nothing good happens when you're around."

Her words stung, but only for a moment as I deciphered their hidden meaning, the spell between the lines. _I __need __you __to __touch __me __again.__Just, __let__'__s __do __this __my __way._That's all she was really saying, and who was I to deny her anything? As she'd pointed out, I didn't even know her and I hadn't even gotten her name yet. Still, in my world, it's ladies first. I continued to follow and she let me, without saying a word. I had deciphered a part of her, I was content and joyous beyond words.

We were getting closer, I could tell. Closer to where I would get my fix and satisfy her itch. I found it in the pull of her shoulders, the way she held herself and the electricity that pulsed between up; that was the clue, the dead giveaway. I was in awe and then, I lost sight of her. I became aware of my surroundings as I searched for her and found her again, by the doors to an elevator. We were at her hotel.

I got in with her, just as the doors were about to close and she wouldn't look at me, the space felt too charged and too small. She pressed for floor number three and my palms were starting to sweat again. Did I read her right? She wasn't screaming at me… still, I could be wrong. But it's better to be wrong than forever wondering, I told myself, regaining some semblance of confidence.

Too soon, there was a '_ding!_', the doors were sliding open and she was stepping out. I hadn't regained my bearings and my confidence wavered, yet, I followed. Just as I thought I had lost her again, I heard and saw a door close. Standing outside the unassuming hotel door, I hesitated, took a deep breath, squeezed my eyes shot, hoped that it was right door, and lifting my arm, pressed my palm on it and pushed it open…

* * *

_**oOo**_

* * *

**A/N:**_Well, __that__'__s __a __wrap. __[Wipes __off __sweat __off __her __forehead] __Anyway, __leave __a __comment__ –__or __your __disapproval, by all means, __by __submitting __a __review! __Thanks __for __reading __and __for __your __great __patience, I don't deserve it._


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